Is it possible to want to die, but not want to kill yourself? I mean...I wouldn't say I am suicidal...but I don't want to live. No...I think what I mean to say is that I don't want to feel. I think some people confuse not wanting to live and not wanting to feel. See...the thing is...sometimes I wish I was a cutter. I mean...cutters cut because they want to feel something. They can't feel without hurting themselves physically. I want to STOP feeling. I feel too much. I wish I could turn off my physical feeling and my emotion.

Hmm, what's going on in my life? Besides being on the brink of suicide twice in one week, nothing really.. I keep thinking something is wrong with me.. I think I may have Asperger's Syndrome.. other than that, I really have nothing to write about.. Nothing at all..

so... one of my friends ran away. she left a suicide note saying that she was gunna drown herself. but she didnt she has been gone for like... a few days and... her brother saw her but she booked it. why does she insist on putting the stress on all of us?

Dive

One tentative step
Cut through the misty fog

The internal battle rages

“Why am I doing this?”
“It’s the only way out.”

I never meant to hurt you
I never meant to make you cry
and everytime I cut myself
you held me close and asked me why.

I never meant for you to see
what was hidden underneath
my tattered clothes, my hurting smile
beneath it all my secret grief.

I never meant for you to catch me
I didn't want you to care
You should have let me fall, baby
leave my heart laid bare.

My best friend through high school (and now) is a boy named Eddie. All through high school, I struggled with my sexual identity and with suicidal depression, and he was there to support me. Eddie is gay, and comes from a morally and politically conservative family that doesn't accept him or his "lifestyle choice" (their words not mine).

Yesterday I realized that the fourth of July is coming up in 3 days, my birthday is in two weeks, and today me and my gf have been together for six months. I love my life!!

For the last few days I've started to not only contemplate, but accept, the possibility of suicide. Actually I think I've been thinking about it for years.

A new book examines a gay son's suicide, and his mother's new life.

By Jeff Walsh

Bobby Griffith's four-year struggle with being gay and trying to live a Christian life ended on Aug. 27, 1983.

On that day, the twenty-year-old California man backflipped off a freeway overpass in Portland, OR., timing his leap so his body would be struck and killed by an oncoming tractor-trailer.