My skin feels paper thin, like shifting layers of gauze. Soaking everything up till I am weighted down with such force that I am sluggish, heavy, and falling apart.

She left me hungry. She left me empty. I think I'm just hurt. just Hurt. simpleeee. fall back into yourself. it's that SIMPLE. my organs--lungsheartkidneyspleen--are full of holes and gates and all these ways to Leave. Get beneath my bones, cos my insides only leave room to disappoint.

♥

Today my mom, my brother, Frances, and I went to the zoo. After 3 hours we dropped off frances and my brother.
After that me and my mom went to a therapist named Debbie. I went in while my mom waited outside. An hour later, and it turns out I have clinical depression and need to go see a doctor within the next week or so to get medicine.
The fact that I am bi didn't even come up. It actually wasn't that bad.

Hey guys!

I thought I'd make a few remarks about depression, since it's that time of year throughout much of the world when many people, especially teens and young adults, may be feeling especially vulnerable. As someone who has been diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder, as well as CLinical Depression, I always find this time especially challenging.

Hey guys,

I just want to get the hell out of here. Away from everything. Just gone. I just want, want want want. I want to be accepted. Totally, and without exception. I want people to accept me when I am happy, sad, angry, apathetic, spazzed-out, ecstatic, hyper-off-the-wall, ALL OF IT. I want everyone to accept me through all of it. Everyone.

I just ranted on someone else's journal. Yeah, talk of homophobia gets me a bit riled... whoops. :/

Just posted a new blog entry. If you want to check it out, here's the link:

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.ListAll&friendID=13365...

CAUTION: Contains sadness and self-pity. Read at your own risk.

Now I'm going to go try and finish Chapter Seven.

Hugs amigos.

"After all, tomorrow is another day." - Scarlett O'Hara

So... In the next few paragraphs, words or sentences, I'm going to try to tel l you all how I feel.

Hopelessness
Helplessness
Sadness

I feel kinda bad, got into an argument with my mom in 2 different parking lots, just feel like i did something so wrong because she said she was depressed about the usual, and was like take me home and just ope that she just doesn't do anything...

So, I broke up with my girlfriend. It was my fault, and my doing. This is what happened:

For the last few days I've started to not only contemplate, but accept, the possibility of suicide. Actually I think I've been thinking about it for years.

It's been quite some time since I last wrote to you guys, and I'm hurt. Very hurt.

Something's happening...I need to take control. I'm going to tell you all about my past. There was a time in my life, when I hated myself.
Literally. I despised me myself and I.

Walking briskly, white wind in my face.
I've come a long way to be in this place.
I see you there judging my case
But I walk right past you to be a star.
Shooting madly across the sky.
To be like a star in someones eye.

I want to impress you with what I can do.
I want to confess all the way through.
I want to be a star in the sky.
I want to be there in your eye.