I decided last night that sometimes I really am crazy. My mind just doesn't know what's going on, and I completely lose it.

my head hurts. i hate stress. i'm sorry i don't have anything more interesting to say

Little well known that its been a year and a half since my father had a stroke. Untill today he had this nasty chest cold and went to the hospital. Bronconist, not unusual to me since I had it as a kid. But the xray shows otherwise, he also has some abcess on his lung. They are sending it to a speicalist.

I remember writing oasismag about my fathers anarysm and had small partual of his brain removed and how it was a biggest scare for all of us. A year and a half later hes still smoking and they found unknown abonomonly in his chest. How dumb is that? Part of me dont feel sorry, and I feel wicked for it. Hes my father. *Sigh* Men never changes.

yeah, today i was lighting a cigarette with a match in my car and somehow i thought that fire doesn't burn. So two fingers on my left hand have little burns on them. This means i can maturbate only with my right hand. Life's a bitch.

So boobs suck. Well, not everyone's, just my boobs. So recently I have been thinking about a breast reduction, because life would be much easier with smaller boobs. I probably wont get one, because I pride myself in loving myself for who I am, and I want to learn to love my breasts in all their bigness. If they were so big that they caused me serious health problems then I would be much more likley to go through with it, but the're not.

I had the most fabulous weekend. I went to a Margaret Cho show, and oh-my-fuckin-gosh, it was hilarious. She's so...amazing...and admirable. They way she delivers her material is so fresh. In short, Margaret Cho is my hero. She was also an outspoken gay rights supporter, which didnd't really matter to the audience since she had such a huge queer following. It was liberating.

Well, it's getting warm, about 34�F (stupid Fahrenheit, we (the U.S.) should adopt Celsius as our temperature scale of choice). Which means some of the snow is melting. Yay! We got hella lot of snow this year. In February alone we got a record 21.7 inches (yet another scale to replace). Yeah, I know, it may not be a lot to you Northeasterners, but it's still a lot to us. All in all, this has been the 3rd snowiest winter in recorded Indiana history and we have yet to have one single snow day. Bah! I'm sick of it. But, depending on Tuesday's temperature, we are either going to get snow or rain. I'm voting for rain because I simply adore rain, although I wouldn't mind the snow if and only if it came bundled with a SnowDay�. Rain...mmmm, rain....

I'm writing this blog on one of the Unix systems in my school's CS lab. My homework is runnig in the background like the little engine that could. I think it can I think it can.

I'm kind of in poetry thought mode. I didn't really have much of a weekend and what I had was not the great so today, Monday, I want my weekend to start. Unfortunatly for the same reason that I had no weekendl, I'll be trudging through this week spouting I think I can I think I can, like the little engine I am, moving from assignment to assignment befor I go on break.

Today has been suprisingly not bad, considering it's a Monday. I just finished doing my Japanese homework; it was much less painful than it usually is. Of course, it was nice not having to trek across campus in the 6 degree weather to go to the language lab to do it...but that's besides the point.

Last Friday I received the necklaces I'd ordered online...One's a hemp necklace w/rainbow colored beads weaved in, and the other one has the female-female symbol on it. I've been wearing the second one all day, and I find myself wondering if people actually notice.

of a massage. Wringing, kneading, squeezing, lifting. Yummy. I can feel the stretches in my muscles and how it's stimulating my muscle tone. Increasing my circulation and slowly relaxing my nervous system. Removing all the stress and tension. My eyelids are getting heavier and heavier, and then BHAM....the touch is gone. Massages are the best, NOT SEX (well i would'nt know but eh), NOT CHOCOLATE, NOT HOT CHICKS/CUTE GUYS, BUT JUST MASSAGES! Of course a lil sex, some chocolate, and a hottie helping can never run short in the list of things...Boys and girls let your opinions, thoughts, feelings, pourrr....

I believe my dark side is becoming quite evident today. I've been bugged an apathy all day (as well as a headache) and have had a general feeling of fuck-all towards society. I realized how bad it was when I read a response to my own response on a certain user's blog. Normally being called rude and mean would bug me because I don't like to offend anyone. I would feel bad about it. But today, this gloriously dark day, I don't.

If you haven't seen it yet, I definitely recommend it. I believe there's a link in the forum.

How does Maggie get through the day? Is it magic? Is it her cult-like following? No! These four drugs you can find in most homes are what make her a lively and vivacious creature.

And when she's neither lively nor vivacious, then she isn't getting enough of these.

Sex Life + Dad = Bad

Extended usage of parentheses is dangerous to one's health. It screams, "too much time spent in theoryland!"

I want to channel my favorite theorists today. Become... Kristeva, say, or Cixous, for a minute or two. Theory is a deliciously filling alternate universe. It's a place where the real things -- deadlines, feelings, and so on -- are turned away at the entrance. Theory is like ice cream. You want it, but damn it, it's not that good for you in large quantities.

Hi kids!

Yes I know, it's been so very long. It's great to see the old gang as well as all the new people, so welcome to all of you.

Since it has been a long time since I've written, I think we need to catch up on my goings on, so here's my life, as it stands right now, in a nutshell....