omfg!

Wow, The last couple of months have been.. . interesting. I just started to think about how I show myself, how I feel inside. I went to the guidance teahcer at the school and talked to her about me feeling like a guy. This all started when I met up with a chick who was a hermaphrodite child. I thought that was sooo coool!

You look at me, and turn away.
This is not like you every other day.

Your face has turned the other way,
why do you have to act this way?

We used to always hang out together
now we havn't hanged out in forever

I didn't talk to you in 3 weeks.
I know i've been busy, but please wait!

I don't know what I did for this avoidence
so please o please listen closely:

we used to talk all the time

omg.. what a wiered day.. ok.. i told them yesterday.. but yesterday i wasn't aloud on the computer... i had to put my stuff back into my room(all my stuff was downstairs cuz we painted it) aniways.. ya.. so i had to do that .. and my mom was pissed off at me for some reason.. i have no clue.. but i was pissed off at her to.. aniways.. as usual.. i got up and went into the shower and put my hair into a fo hawk(mo hawk with the sides not shaved) and when she got up arround 12 am..(i got up at 7) ..

i was eating an english muffin with hot penut butter on it.. and i went to talk to my friend on msn.. and it all started porringon me :P.. now i'm like all full of penut butter... o well.. it is good aniwys

today was a fun day...i sat with a friend that i didn't talk to much this year.. but it was still awseome... i son't really have much to say.. cuz nothing really happend today.. o ya.. we played a cool game in english calss... it was awesome.. and i got 2 pepermints out of it :P;.... i'm all exempted from all my subjects.. aww.. tomoro is my last day of gym class:(..no more school though after tomor..

wooo.. happy happy happy./.. don't even no why.. i hve like lots of suacides to kech up on in soccer.. but.. wooooooooooo.. i think i might have a few problem.. wooo.. i get to go to the concert.. as long as i don't get drunk.. or come home drunk i'm aliright.. lol.... but everything was good today. somehow.. i didn't really visit anibody today.. but hagin wit my new friend.. :P.. she understands me ..

i don't no whats wrong with me.. everyone disapeared.. no1 likes me.. it seams like.. i'm gone.. no1 sees me they used to.. the only ppl that exepted me for me.. r pissed off at me.. for. some really odd reason prolly i don't no why.. i just found out tht my grandmother has cancer.. and.. i have no1 to tell.. cuz no1 cares.. no1 givees a god danm second of there time to help me.. they try.. but then..

i don't no whats wrong with me.. i can't think strait.. i didnt'think it would hurt this much.. i don't really no what to say.. cuz i can't believe it.. and.. everyone that i was close 2.. seem to disapear and not care no more.. i don't no if it is just me.. but... everyone seems to .. not like me ..the friend that i had since the first dayy of school when i was in kindergarden seemed to disapear.. and i didn't even think i would ever leave him as a friend.. it hurts.. even though he is the opposite sex...i don't no anymore.. i just want to go away.. n start my life all over again.. but no forgeting the past.. .. everyone i met.. seem to b gone in a week.. and i don't want it to b like that animore.. .. i wish i dind't care so much.. n i no i don't care.. but at the same time a do.. i wish i wasn't so confused.. and ppl would just tell me whats going on.. n not hide stuff from me.. cuz usually i find out eventually.. and it really hurts.. that they couldn't tell me. i just don't no what i'm worth animore// n i'm really confused.. nothing ever works out..

.. ahh.. my gfriend is runing away from home cuz her aunt and mom is beating her.. she just left to go to b.c... then she is going to vinina.. .. she will b back in august.. and i'm really going to miss her.. she's gone.. for mostly the holl summer vacation.. what i'm i going to to.. ...... really sad.. but not at the same time.. because.. at least she wont get hurt from them animore.. so it is better for her safety..

Your way of life
The way you see life,
can be turned around.

Upside up,
or downside down.

Lift yourself up
Don’t fall to the ground

If you want to
You can turn around

Life is a game
Not to serious

Have some fun
Because you’re in it

You’re the master of all your hopes and dreams
Don’t be scared, just believe

The way you see life

why the fuck does everybody care so dannm much if you are gay or not.. guys why don't u fuck off. it doesn't matter if i am or not. why can't you understand that. and it takes a lot of guts to come out.. and each time i tellyou im gay.. and you already no it you all spred it arround the school. like it wasn't news b4.. why can't you ppl just grow up. and leave me the fuck alone..........

I got kicked out for a day cuz my hair makes me look like a guy. jesus mom.. i've been leaving hints everywere.. can't you just pick up. you even read when that person came on my msn and said do you have a girlfriend yet.. you would think cuz i no you read it.. you would think that you would no.. n so what if i like to look i like to look in the guys section for cloth.. they have more better and much cooler stuff.<(break)> .and wearing black doesn't mean that you take drugs..