I think my brother in law has just found out,by mistake that I am gay.I'm so stressed out right now,I don't
know what to do.I feel really really sick. I'm sort of shakeing here too. I have messed up so bad!
He has just seen some stuff on my computer, I seen him looking, but he doesn't know I saw. I don't know what
to do. I couldn't even look at him when he logged off.He didn't say any thing. I don't know if he will say

Hmm,I am having another one of those "I'm angry at the world days". I am not even sure why. Well thats not
100% true. There are a few things that are just irritating me right now, and I guess they were all just
really bugging me today. First of all, I hate when people try to control me. I am 21 but my family tries to
control a lot of things I do. I know they love me a lot, but sometimes I just wish they would leave me alone

Its been a couple of weeks since I made a journal entry but I kind of feel like going on a bit of a ramble
so here I go with another journal entry.

I feel kind of weird today.I don't feel sad but I don't feel happy. Hmmm does that mean I'm content? I don't
think it really does.I think it just means nothing bad happened to me today to upset me, but nothing
particularly good happened to make me all happy.Whatever,at least I'm not all miserable.

Its been two days since I've spoken to the girl I just might love.We aren't fighting or anything,we have
just both been busy,I keep wanting to call her,but I don't want to freak the girl out.She has no idea
I'm gay and completely in love with her,but if I bombard her with a phone call every time I think about
her,I'm sure it would not be long until she would notice.I could have gone to a party with her tonight if

Well nothing major has happened with me since my last journal entry,but I kind of just feel like
writing,so here comes another journal entry from me.

I just have to say college makes me so tired.I've been used to having my days free for the last month.
Oh well it could be worse.I'm glad I actually have somthing constructive to do with my time again. I
think I am actually settling in ok in college.I have got chatting to a few people in my class so I'm

Here we go,yet another entry from me.I used to write most of this stuff down in my own journal,but since
joining this website almost four months ago I tend to come on here to ramble on about my life.I prefere
to type instead of write,thats not really relevlant to anything,but oh well,just thought I'd say it.

Well I finally started college,I had a total meltdown and panic about it earlier this week,but today when I

Warning!This is going to be a whiny,unhappy post.I'm just making that clear from the start incase you
happen to read it and get to the end thinking-jeeze that was depressing,why did I read it?

I feel so sad today,and yesterday I was just so happy and gleaming.They have been two days in sharp
contrast to each other.I start my first year in college this week,and yesterday when I was talking
about it I was so happy and excited.Telling everyone,including myself how great it is going to be,and

I'm sort of bored today,so I've decided to make a journal entry.Or should I just say ramble of stuff running
through my head at the moment.Well I've been thinking a lot about what to do about my friend who I think
is gay,and who I think suspects I am.I've decided next time I see her in person I will come out to her,and
just be open and honest about myself.Whether or not she is gay doesn't really matter,it would be cool if she

Your on my mind,
I think of you so much,
Imagine a kiss,a tender touch,
You are always on my mind,
Love Is so unkind.

I know we could never be together,
My feelings are suppressed,
Buried deep inside,
I must forever hide,
That you are on my mind.

I see you just one glance,
And I'm locked in a trance,
I know its wrong,
For me to long,
For you to know my name,
That I'm not the same,

....hilarious line from one of the best movies I've seen!I've just watched Imagine Me and You,and I
seriously cannot believe how good it was.I know people have posted on here about it before but I just felt
the need to write about because I enjoyed it so much.Its such a sweet film that made me feel warm and
fuzzy inside.I love how the characters didn't have any long agonizing scenes over their sexuality,they

I'm having kind of a strange day.I'm not too sure if my friend actually knows I'm not straight,and I'm
not too sure if she is even straight and if she knows that I know that she is not straight.Wow that
was confusing to type.Well I guess I should start at the beginning of this and give some background
information on the whole thing,and if you manage to read through this ramble of confusion and have any

I now feel a little better because my mother is back to "normal" with me.She has stopped giving me the
silent treatment,but I hate that I'm only happy now that she is back to normal with me.I wish that I just
didn't care,but I do,and by caring about what she thinks I'm giving her so much control over me.