facef**k anyone?

the ghost — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 13:31:27 -0500

I am very glad that I wrote my last journal entry, to find out if I was too old to be hanging out here. Thanks guys for your responses. I feel welcome and reassured that it is ok to still be on here.

too old for Oasis now?

the ghost — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 15:39:07 -0500

I've been thinking since reading Ruby's journal a few days ago about being too old for Oasis, that perhaps I have gotten too old to be on here. I guess the site does say for queer and questioning youth. I'm not really questioning any more or a youth, since I am 23. I am still queer however.

A list of good stuff

the ghost — Sat, 27 Dec 2008 14:33:22 -0500

I seem to post a lot of negative stuff on here about my life, especially the last few days I was feeling fairly shitty.

.

the ghost — Thu, 25 Dec 2008 22:20:33 -0500

My Christmas day did suck a lot. I didn't really want to post a miserable Christmas journal, but I have been venting to my friend all day and I still don't feel better. He now had to leave so I guess I will continue the vent here.

Just to say

the ghost — Wed, 24 Dec 2008 16:21:07 -0500

I've said it before and I'll say it again.... Happy Christmas you gays =]

If You Can't Beat 'em Join 'em

the ghost — Thu, 18 Dec 2008 19:51:04 -0500

I've been frantically typing a report for college for about a week now. It was one of the greatest reliefs of my life to hand it over today. The first semester of 3rd year has come to an end...well except for my exams after Christmas.But lets not think about them for the moment.

It's getting a little better

the ghost — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 12:57:32 -0500

I've been meaning to write a journal for a few days now, but once I finish working on assignments I haven't wanted to go near a computer. I have been feeling a lot better since my last journal. I went along to see the counsellor. I had my first visit there last week. It was a strange experience to go into a room with a total stranger and pour my heart out.

Counsellor

the ghost — Sun, 30 Nov 2008 19:53:04 -0500

Well I have applied to see a counsellor at my college. I have to wait until Monday for them to get back to me with a date and time. I am nervous about going. But I obviously cannot continue the way I am right now. Which is just a downward spiral. I keep feeling like things can't feel any worse, and then they do.

today

the ghost — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 17:45:27 -0500

My lgbt society thingy is officially the biggest disappointment in history. I went along tonight and just felt uncomfortable. I have been forcing myself to go along for weeks. But when I get there I always become quite introverted. I also kind of find most of the other members a little irritating. I also feel like an idiot because I have absolutly no clue of the gay scene.

almost maybe never

the ghost — Sat, 22 Nov 2008 20:26:14 -0500

Tonight was the night I was going to do it. I was going to come clean to my friend M that the reason I never have a boyfriend is because I am a lesbian. I had it in my head...we will come around to the usual converstaion of "so do you have your eye on any boys?" and I'd say "no, I'm actually gay". Seems simple. I however could not follow through on it. I got scared and I don't know why.

I met Chris Walla

the ghost — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 19:42:58 -0500

Where oh where has my motivation for getting anything done gone? I started off this college year doing well academically....and techniqully I still am doing well.But I feel like if I don't start doing some work again soon that will not last.

get out of the rut

the ghost — Sat, 15 Nov 2008 18:10:31 -0500

There is a lot of stuff I want to do. I want to meet a whole new bunch of people at college, I want to go out and have fun student nights. I want to play my guitar and sing and be young.....is 23 even still young? I want to just enjoy life....I want to be happy... I want to be free.

Progressive lesbian

the ghost — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 10:40:09 -0500

If anyone has a cure for absolute crippling shyness please send it on this way! I feel like I need to write a journal to cleanse my mind a little bit...but at the same time I am trying not to over analyze things right now either.

still haven't found what I'm looking for

the ghost — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 13:48:44 -0500

What the hell is wrong with me? I stayed in bed until after 2 today. I should of been up at 8 for college. I skipped classes all day for no good reason. It's not something I would do usually. I am far too much of a nerd for that. I just feel so down and like nothing is ever going to be ok again. I don't even know if it has ever really been ok to start with though.

party party

the ghost — Sat, 01 Nov 2008 16:58:03 -0400

I am so so tired today. I went to the Halloween party last night that I mentioned in my previous journal. It was ok, I didn't hate it, but then I didn't think it was a particularly great night either. It was good to go out and socialise with people. It was also kind of interesting, as the topic of being gay and coming-out seemed to crop up a bit.