SHOPPING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I FINALLY DID IT! MY GREATEST ACHIEVEMENT YET!!!!!!!! I BOUGHT A JOCKSTRAP! WOHO FOR ME!
and i'm glad i did coz frankly it looks sooo fucking hot...all i need now is a man...a lucky lucky mother fucker of a man. and a place to put it where my grandmother wont find it...she'll probably come to me and say "where is the rest of this sonny?"
in other news, i drank two bottles of wine and went to work on my thighs with a stanley knife...which i regret massively. i think being me and being alone is a bad combination
i really like vegemite....im eating it out of the tube and everybody thinks i'm weird but i dont care it's as close to eating vegetables as it's goign to get. so i may have met a guy called nimrod and he might be a soldier and he might be really cute if he likes me too which is unlikely but meow?
out
oh oh, and.....there's a guy who's coming to israel next month for a week, met him on gaydar, and he's hot...should i have a little hotel room fun with him?

I HAVE A NEW FRIEND! and there was much rejoicing...

so he can't really talk...some medical condition i suppose...he was made in china...but i have nothing against asians...he's plastic..but then so am i....
he's tiny...like...maybe fifteen cm on ten....and he's a hippo...but then...so am i...
he's got his mouth open...and since he can't talk he couldn't very well tell me his name...so i named him deepthroat...for obvious reasons.

AND HE'S COMING TO MY DINNER PARTY~!!! YAY!!!! it's tonight....it's going to be me, deepthroat and a bottle of wine. i'm thinking ill make skewers on the grill and burn up some potatoes and onions...maybe i'll make a cake for dessert too....and can't forget that bottle of win...think actually i might get another one...hippos drink a lot. anyway i'll set up the table...i'll use the white cloth...and the good crokery and what not...i'll put two place settings for us...and i'll light up the menorah (last night of hanuka...i also got the book so i can do the prayer properly...and my blue kipa....oh this is exciting. i only have one table candle though...but it'll have to do....and i'll put some nice background music and maybe when we've both had enough wine...i suppose about a bottle each...deepthroat and i will go dancing! it's going to be a magical evening!!!!

body? hmm..yes please...preferably with a pulse and a penis...a functional one if it's not too much.

i like eating dark chocolate with red wine and pomegranates with white wine

i want a econd tattoo...maybe...as a christmas present to myself...on account of not having anyone else to give me one. which brings me to the question of who will i kiss on new years eve? i suppose i'll kiss myself or my little yemeny girlfriend....thoguh kissing girls is way grose and makes me laugh hysterically...i suppose i could give it a whirl...if i'm drunk enough i might even pleasure the little whore...tick one more thing off my "to try before you die" list. speaking of which i'm officially goign to try out pot...i figure tommorow coz my grandparents are leaving for a week, and i figure i'll invite one of my friends since they're all pothead/ pot missionaries and i'm their little pot virgin. i'm only worried about my clothes smelling so i might just find a friend to get naked with...which might be fun in some ways. i wonder if i have any more wine? psshhhhht....i need to cook now..fuck.
another guy dumped me yesterday...which brings the grand total to three royal dumps...which coincidentally is the same number of boyfriends i've had. it is here that a pattern emerges and you begin to wonder..."so when he said coincidentally....he was kinda wrong huh?" well yes indeed you are correct sir/madam. two of those dumps were in the last month...with the week in between my first ex boyfriend...the relationship with which was based on emotional blackmail on his part and ended with a "i don't trust you not to cheat on me so i'm dumping u'r ass"....emails me and tell me he's madly in love with me and this country and wants to come back and be with me...and throws in that while his boyfriend is inside him he thinks of me.
that's nice dear....morals much?

listening to rock songs makes me sarcastic...listening to jazz makes me sad...listening to pop makes me work...listening to bjork makes me artistic and listening to my grandmother gives me a headache.

i don't like missionaries....particularly not in africa. i also don't like hassidic jews that want me to lay tefilin in the street with them....i wear blue skinny jeans with black pointy cowboy boots..do i look like i lay tefilin? fuckers.

i want some poor mother fucker to fall in love with me so badly he wont know what hit him...that's the only way i can see anybody matching the intensity which i radiate in a relationship (in a strictly not "psycho" kind of a way). promise i'm really quite normal when i'm not alone.

i bought myself a present for xmas....even though i'm jewish and living in israel...i used to live in australia and go a catholic school and i know the hail mary and the lord's prayers off by heart so i figure i fucking deserve one. anyway it's a crimson velvet suit jacket and its fucking hot...especially when i wear it with my blue polo, blue diamond patterned vest and pink tie with skinny jeans and casual shoes.
which brings me to the point that i have fucking awesome legs.

i don't like fat dogs...but fat people are nice...though not beyond...say....100kg for women and 12o for men....coz then their fatness has nothing to do with their love of food and everything to do with their hate of themselves...and i lead by example...i hate myself and manage to keep my weight ok..why the fuck can't you? no offence fat people. and i mean...lets face it...skinny people are worse anyway....the less flesh you have the less personality i find...it's like people's personality is kept in their fat. i like people who like eating and aren't ashamed of it, especially if they like yemeny food.

my friend's brother is going all the way to spain to fuck a guy...seems kinda expensive to me...i would have thought israel is so full of spanish people..why can't you just fuck one right here?

movies about aliens suck

my little cousin calls me the princess...which i must say i really like...so i call her the ballerina..though she's really more of a moroccan ogre. cute little thing though there's no doubt.

what do you think about piercings? i'm thinking their really grose and i don't give a shit what you think

talking about sex is fun....the night i spent with that guy who just dumped me...we had five hours of foreplay...so when it came right to it..i barely had to do anything before he came... then i came up real close to him and whispered in his ear 'omlette"....no joke i seriously did do this...i also headbutted him regularly...and on purpose..and tickled his knees. im thinking i gave him a very post modern sex experience. i never came though...takes too much fucking work...that sucks...takes too long to make me cum..
why is it cum and came/ come and came not cum and cume? does anyone else think that's fuckedup?

i heard something i liked in a movie the other day...a johnny depp movie no less, which for the record i think he's overrated and annoying. anyway he said he likes the city coz it's the only place where you can see everyone but nobody can see you? how fucking cynical and yet true...and how sad for modern culture....i propose we all go back to living in villiages.
death to google i say....death to google...and no i dont' have any particular reason to say that

i also hate ikea

have you ever tried walking up to people and using u'r sexy voice to say strange things? try it it's fun...go to u'r friends and say "mouse". go do it or i'll fart in u'r general direction

i love monty python...
fuck i need someone to talk to....
my aunt is in the bombing zone near gaza right now...sucks to be her.
i dont' like politics dont' talk to me about it i'll just call you a mother fucker and play with my thumbs

i dress better than the fashion designers at my school...i think that says a lot about those dipshits.

my mobile is white.

jeffy....give me u'r email address again and i'll send you those drag pics....but i must warn you...some of them are nude..one's a back nude of me with an apron, bra, leather boots and tiny little hot pink underwear around my ankles...and another one if me with a see through tunic and the same hot pink undies and boots and a blonde curly wig giving head to a girlfriend of mine that was dressed as a man with polo/vest/tie and leather pants/hat.

turns out i'm a good drag queen! yay! i finally did it, i always wanted to try it out... lol and as a result a straight boy wants to "experiment" with me....hehehehe!
i got me a little o tattoo, actually not so little....medium size i'd say...tis on my inner left thigh about...oh.....20cm down the ding dong. i like it!
so uni.....wow huh? i got 14 people in my course....12 smoke, 10 smoke pot regularly, i'd say about 5 do heavier drugs....3 cut on a regular basis. meow....fun to be in art! buuut i do go to school with fashion designers and they make me laugh and i like competing with them in dress.....which of course i win! meow!
going out tonight to meet some homo friend's of a girlfriend of mine...much fun indeed.
omg! like nobody who knows me here would believe this...but....i kissed a girl...and i liked it. actually i laughed hysterically after about ten seconds....but hey...at least now i can say i did it right? definately wont be exploring heterosexuality any further.....eeeesh.
on which point, we had a life-drawing model the other day....hippy bitch from jerusalem....and OMG HER POOSHPOOSH WAS LIKE SOOO HAIRY! it looked like a tarantula....no i can't spell for shit but i can paint and draw and sculpt better than all of you so FUCK OFF!
i love suspenders...they make sexyness explosion in my panties.
oh...when i was doing the drag (we also did it as a photography assignemnt) [we being my girlfriends and i], i got a little carried away (i blame the wine) but took some nude pictures of me taking off hot pink undies that belonged to one of the girls....hehehehe, it was horrid and pervy but ey....that's me! also took one of me pretending to give head toa girlfriend of mine that was dressed like a man...that fucked with some religious people's minds. meow, not much offence intended!
anyway we also showed it to my art history teacher....she shoots vagigi juice at people who sit in the front row...i've seriously never seen an old polish lady that was such a nympho...i love her! anyway she liked it.
speaking of old people....i'm going to be 21 soon! :O that's nearly thirty!
toodles elevator ferret love machines
adam
xoxoxox!

i'm lonely

why do i only come on here when i'm unhappy in some way??
i'd give you the usual shit i do but meh, i'm too tiered, it's half past one and i have to wake up soon for uni.

something is wrong, i can feel it, it's making me anxious and irritated.
grr i can't be fucked writing more
love ya freaks
adam

EW A STRAIGHT GIRL HIT ON ME AND I SAW HER BOOBY *shivers and eye twitches*
fucking straighties

Kevin Gnapore - Maths Enthusiast/badass mc

yo yo yo all you sucka mcs aint got nothing on me all my grades are in line you can't touch kevin g. I'm a mathlete, I'm a nerd, but nerds just a word so forget what you heard I'm like James Bond the third. I'm shaken not stirred, I'm Kevin Gnapore. The "G' is silent when I walk through the door make love to your woman on the bathroom floor. I don't play it like Shaggy, you'll know it was me. Cause the next time you see her she'll be like "Oohh Kevin G." Happy Holidays Everybody!

i love it when people snort

i had a bad day :(
everybody wants me to open up and say what's really on my mind....psshttt, they only think they do....they don't really, right? i figure families are like clubs, if you don't pay you lose u'r membership, sucks but its only fair, i guess that's what happened, i disappointed them and they disappointed me, so now we're all ashamed of me and my existence. still, it doesn't matter how much they manage to piss me off or make me cry, i'll never open up fully...hhahahaha i open up more in this place than in real life, it's easier, u'r strangers now aren't you bunny lovers? and i'm just a random person somewhere in israel who's name happens to be adam. i often wonder if you think i behave in real life like i do here most of the time? hahahaha, silly buggers. why do my mother and grandmother manage to squeeze some truth out of me all the time?? then they make me angry and say what i feel, then they tell me it hurts and i feel guilty, so then i talk to them because i know that's what they want...i tell them what they want me to tell them...a little slice of truth...and then i feel ashamed, and selfish for having done that...i i sacrifice just a little more of myself. been doing it for ten years or more now....think i'm reaching the point where i'm just losing myself now, so caught up between making people happy, hiding one thing for another and minimising every need i have, every smallest pleasure, every desire, always counting every cent and making as much room for others in place of myself that at this point it seems like my whole being is made up more of them than it is of me.....whoever the fuck that is. how do you tell somebody...."u'r killing me inside, i hate me and i'm beggining to hate you", and what's a person supposed to think when they hear that. wont they all think i'm just another emo with his head screwed on wrong? aren't you thinking it right now?? you so are!
honestly though, i'm not! god it wasn't that long ago i was happy and bright and optimistic and faithful and everything! i still see so much good in the world, so much beauty, in everything, in everyone. i'm just tiered, i've become such a nomad lately, my whole life is in my back pocket everything i have i've been given, i owe so much to so many people. and i've got nothing left to give of me, nothing at all. hmmm, why must everything be so fucking retarded? since when did my life become a bad episode of the bold and the beautiful! (i know...there are no good episodes of the bold and the beautiful). most of all i'd like to know...where the fuck did adam of ten years ago go? and where did adam of five, of one year ago go...where in god's name did all my hope go? and why is it that all i have left now is apollo alexander, a person i love so much, who knows me inside out and understands me perfectly...but that i'm just not capable of touching, of reaching, that's the cruelest part of all....when all i ever wanted from my life, moreover art, moreover anything full stop...was to be with my alexander. what can i give him? what can i give you? fate fucked with us and put us together apart and then together in the oddest times and now it seems it screwed us again, don't you think it would have been better if we reunited five years from now? after i finished my little crisis? how can i expect you to stand by me when i can't even stand to be with me....it's so fucking annoying when somebody is sad all the time...i know....i hate being around depressed people they piss me off, but i can't help it, it's beyonde my control, i've always been a slave to my emotions. aaah i know what u'r thinking....man cut the mellowdramatic crap and shut the fuck up! i know, i think it all the time to myself....fuck, how indulgent to rave on and feel all gloomy when there are people who have it much worse, people you know....even people you love? how much is a person allowed to take for themselves? how do you know what you deserve and what you must share? it seems to me i'm always either giving too much or taking too much....if i ive too much i feel empty, if i take to much i fill like i'm overflowing, i want to feel full, satisfied, stable. i know only one way of doing that...being with you, hearing u'r stories, or listening to my song with you. perhaps i'm just too damn romantic or emotional....or maybe i'm immature, fuck..what's so good about being mature though? i don't know any adult who's that much better than me, we've all got our little flaws right? my mother said she's embarassed of me today.....that really hurt. hmm, she's so disappointing, and yet i love her so much. it seems like no matter how hard i try and make her proud it just doesn't work....and my grandfather...well i'll never be my cousin, i'm not straight or religious, i'm not even patriotic, israel doesn't mean more to me that a place where i was born...my true home is not a land but a person, a state of mind, and after all i'm not only israeli, i'm australian too, or maybe i'm neither...eh who cares? really...i don't. i really didn't want to expose alexander to this side of me....it's not really me, i don't think, it's just a very small part of me that's wollen and sore right now....it's making me ugly in every sense of the word, and i so wanted to protect alexander from that. i'm afraid it's me that needs protection. i can't decide wheather or not i'm strong or weak, is it a strong person that stayes, takes the punches, gives a few back, hinges on a belief, on a commitment to a person rather than a commitment to a thing or to oneself...or is it a weak person, who gives up his hopes and dreams for other people to take, who gives himself away rather than gets his share, who lets the punches come and doesn't block them first? grr shut up adam! i mean, shut the fuck up right?! hahahahahhahahaha, i can just see this monologue being performed by like thorne forster or stephanie....such bores.
i'll probably feel bad for having taken so much space on journals wall... lol, sorry guys!
anyway, i believe meangirls and amelie are awaiting me in the mail so just as soon as i can i'll get that package out and watch them, then i'll be right as rain again. back to meowing and calling you all fuckers...keep you entertained like you know you like it!
sorry for the downer, hope you didn't read it.
adam

MWAHAHAHAHAHA
the corrupted wish forum game will never end! NEVER!!!!!

sslllllllluuuuuuuuuuuttttttttttttsssssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
fuck i love work, hahahaha, my shift manager yesterday was so bored she drew the manager on the computer, it game me funnytime, then she drew me...she got my shirt right. her name is ola, hahahahahaha, funny russians and their funny names. i was also with carmit, she's a comedian, no literally she used to be a comedian, she's not that funny though...perhaps that's why she's not a comedian anymore.
i want red wine and dark chocolate...now!
toodles FERRET FUCKING VENUS FLY TRAPS!

the fuck!

i come back to where i'm staying and there's like 20 random fuckers here. now i can't go into the kitchen till they fuck off!! and i'm hungry and thirsty and tiered and pissed the fuck off!!!! plus i'm officially fighting with everybody i know except apollo alexander...and those i'm not fighting with im grudging for the next year or so.

hence

THE FUCK!!

I TOLD YOU TO EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

apollo alexander looks so good in cadigans.

i'm thinking of getting these sexy ass skinny pants that are like beige with brown and green (and possibly blue) checkers......they're totally fucked up and retarded and i love that about them. on that note, i really miss my green yellow blue and black checkered jacket...i really must get that fucker back.

what do you think of thumb rings?? i got a cartier knockoff, a decent one, that goes nicely on the old thumb.

i really need chocolate right now. or a hug....that would help too.

i'm getting a cold...which sucks, naturally.

i'm reading a book from the sixties that's really racist and sexist...supposed to be the best spy book ever, obviously they didn't make good spy books before the 1960's coz it's barely average.

i really love the movie "hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy" and yes i know there's a book and i don't give a flying fuck, it's like harry potter, watch the movie and shut up! anyway i love the depressed robot! hahahaahahaha, he makes me funnytime.

Will.I.Am is really feral....he seriously thinks he's hot.

i love apollo alexander! meow!

so tiered

hahahahaha, i met my boyfriend here! hahahaahahaha

in other news...i like an eminem song...don't hate me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! in my defence it's "shake that ass for me" so at least i got that going for me :P

starting uni soon. they told me the course was exclusive, but there's only 11 students in my whole course...and that's just a little retarded, especially coz they're all "man nobody understands me, i'm so depressed i'll go slit my wrists now" type of artists....thinking being a depressto artist is like...new...or...radical....FUCKERS!

i hate super skinny guys that think they're hot, it irks me, and when i think of them having sex with someone it turns my stomach.

i'm friends with an orthodox jew....never thought that would ever happen....she wears a wig, and she's preggo.....i mean the bitch couldn't possibly be any more different from me, but i fucking love her, she's so....fetch!

my best friend's a bitch, i wish all her uni assignments would pile up and drop on her head. meow!

after i had my hair bleach blonde for a month and a bit i dyed it again, it's like emo black now...lol! my poor fucking hair is so going to drop out one day. and i switch daily form curly to straight.

why are straight guys such grose primitive shitheads?

it's fucking yom kippur (atonement day) in two days....waaaay don't feel like it. gotta work too....i'm so not taking responsibility for my bad fasting breath...and if i drop dead...i'm so sueing...fuckers!

in which state is florida? why do i care?

how cold is it in seattle? i need this measurement in celcius...i'm a normal person who uses the metric system which is in every way superior and makes so much more sense than the imperial system!

i love david

i wonder if i'd look good in a jock? hm...

is there zara in america? if there isn't i'm so just not moving there!

anyone interested in homo art? im poor....really

i'd go straight for alison goldfrapp, i love that bitch....but i think her venus fly trap is probably poisoned and full of teeth.....so i'd think three times before putting my shlong in there.

i totally lost my gaydar since moving to israel.....it majorly sucks not knowing whos a homo and who's not....mostly coz i want a pet lesbian and a little twinky to go shopping with. hehehe i love twinkies

i dressed up super well and went shopping the other day....found that shopkeepers leave you alone when you look better than them....that was way fun....little fuckers didn't know what to say.

i hate latin music, it shits me off....and they say corazon too much...do you ever think about anything else people? my ex boyfriend was latin though....well...colombian....wasn't a druggo but was plenty nutz. i love their skin colour and their accent...but he was talking spanish and i was talking hebrew....so we had communication troubles. he knew what to do with tongue though...to that's the important thing! i win!

ruby sucks

pomegranates are the bestest fruit in the world.

red and blue mixed is purple. more red than blue and it's violet, more blue than red and it's indigo, also depending on the kind of blue and red. purple is a nice colour. so is blue.....so is red.

i'm an excellent artist, really...i'm fucking awesome

i suck at maths....i can't add up. all i can do is long division, and i find it awesomely fun, i used to do random excercises in it when i was bored in class...which was often.

stella is a nice name...but stella isn't really that nice.

adam comes from the root ADM, which in hebrew builds the words adama - earth and adom - red.

i was born in a place five minutes drive away from the sodom mountain range and sites of soddom and gamora....i think it's funny.

i like ruby's and david likes saphires. ruby's are red and saphires are blue....my fav. colour is red and his is blue. i'm going to marry that boy.

im hungry

bye!