Surprisingly,
...it was NOT a shitty monday. :)

usually when the week begins (a monday lol)...it doesn't start off good. but today was actually...a good day.
i was happy the whole day and in a very good mood!

why?

dinner last night :)

so...a few coworkers decided to make a surprise dinner for another coworker @ the Old Spaghetti Factory and i decided to bring along my friend/crush.
i thought it might be awkward 'cause we've actually haven't done anything together besides just meet up and talk, so it was nice to just do something different.

hey guys. I'm currently stuck between a rock and a hard place. like, i know what i should do but my feelings get in the way (like always).
maybe i should start this off from the beginning.

about an hour and a half ago, i closed one chapter of my life.
i'm ready to start anew and begin a new chapter.
i just need to figure out what i'm going to do about the next issue that i need to take care of.
i'm beginning to think that i just need to stop overthinking and leave it behind.
to just let fate takes its course and have faith that the time will come for things to happen.

faith.
the reason i got that tattoo was to remind myself everyday that i need to have faith in the things that happen in my life whether they are good or bad.

thank you to those who commented on my post;
-dracofangxxx
-wolfcry
-the ghost

we were very lucky today.
*sigh of relief*

Tsunami warning here in Hawaii since 12am.

woke up @ 5am to a txt from my boss saying that i don't have to come into work today 'cause of the tsunami warning.

my prayers go out to Chile who had an 8.8 earthquake around 8:30pm last night my time.

i'm just trippin' out.
i can't go back to sleep. -_-

i'm just making sure everyone, family and friends are okay and safe.

i'll post back what happens.
supposed to hit @ 11am.
3 and a half more hours.

!!

..."everybody need inspiration, everybody needs a soul. the beautiful melody, when the nights alone. cause there is no guarantee that this life is easy..."

4 nights mann.
thursday to sunday.

thursday;
-a friend of mine had a bag of weed that she was selling and this girl that she met on CL wanted some...and my friend is kinda "talking" to this girl but my friend is not gay nor bi :/...

..."let you go, walk away. dont turn around, nothing to say. before another lover is lost, baby because I was just an afterthought..."

this is actually a nice deep song.
Afterthoughts by: Unknown.

i'm home.
today was the first day of my 6-day work week.
5 more days to go.
...
i'm glad that i had the weekend to try and rest up for this week.
i think i'm beginning to not have a life...again.
when i first started working at Jamba in 2007.
all i did was work. or was at work.
if i wasn't at school or work...i was at home.
and if i wasn't at school or home...i was at work.

hi guys.
it's thursday night. lmao. and i'm at home.
i'm not complaining. but i'm usually not at home on thursdays.
well i'm at home but...i'm usually working at this time ahah.
...
today,
-seemed like a long day.
*went to class @ 9, got out at 10:15.
*stayed @ school til 3 doing homework.
*went to work and chilled with coworkers til 5.
*chilled with a certain someone.
*picked up my friend @ 5:45 and got home and picked her son up @ 6:30.
*saw another friend walking and took her work.
*finally got home around 7.
...
not really that much.
but too much driving lol.
...

it's 10:41pm.
i just got off of work 3 hours ago.
i have school & work tomorrow, going to be out from 8am to 8pm.
i should be happy.
school and work, are going well. besides the point that i have debts that need to be paid.
i'm content with how things are with school and work.
but...
i'm not happy.
...
i don't need to have/be with someone to be happy.
but i am happy with that person.
...
that person apparently...
has me only as a second option.
a fucking second option.
...when i'm supposed to be the one she loves?
i believe that she doesn't love me.
or...whatever.

..."staring out at the rain with a heavy heart. it's the end of the world in my mind. then your voice pulls me back like a wake up call. i've been looking for the answer. somewhere, i couldn't see that it was right there. but now I know what I didn't know..."

i'm bored. tired. and a little sick. lol.
i haven't been on here in...AGES.
it's almost gonna be 4 years since i been on this site...gosh...i remember when it was called Oasis Mag lol.
that's how long.
...
how has everyone been?
i've been doing okay.
school. and work.
and maybe the occasional outings lol.

"...the better off i'll be."
...
*sigh*.
i want school to start already. i need things to keep me busy. june was too much of a bad month for me. i'm hoping that july gets better but i highly doubt it. i just want time to pass by quickly and august to be here already.
...
i haven't been on since april. a lot has happened since then. a lot has happened since a lot of things. i'm just living each day with a calmness that i'm lying to myself with. trying to make myself feel better about everything going on even though deep inside i know that its not okay. but i need to be strong especially now.

sooooooo.
last night; tuesday night. 30 Mar. 2009
i had the most weirdASSest dream that i think that i have ever had.
...
i'll tell it to you:

i was with my gf, uncle dave, and uncle jason. my uncle dave rented a room for all of us to stay at in a resort-looking place the the night. it seemed like a spring break kinda vacation 'cause there was a lot of people at the place, moreso young people than older.

i think that as much as everyone wants to think that there was a killer...
...jenny just offed herself.

well.
i just finished reading the LWord recap on www.thelwordonline.com by: Riese, who i admire for her recaps on each episode altho i have only read 3 recaps lol.
but towards the end it actually makes sense.
like, jenny admitted to kit that she knows that no one wants her around and such and in the end of the tribute tape she's saying thank you and goodbye.
idk dude.

...will sadly probably NOT be watched by me.

why?
'cause i don't catch Showtime.
gosh i would love to watch the whole 2 hour finale event.
:[
but i will, oh yes i will, be watching the last episode.
THAT...i would not miss 'cause YouTube :p lol.
i can't wait...can you?
i just LOVES the show.
&&i hope Carmen makes an appearance.
i know molly does, but i'm not too fond of molly lol.

ahhhhh.
i'm excited but not.
it's the last fricken season.
i hate that.
but maybe the spinoff will be good.
but then all you'll probably see is Alice.
gah.

as you can see.
i can't sleep.

of two girls in love. :]

gahh.
its a good movie so far.
:]
i lovee stumbling upon movies like this and just curling up in bed just wasting the day away lol.
i still can't believe that its Laurel Holloman as Randy.
i feel like i'm watching a teenage version of the L Word, but with just her and looking like a oldendays shane aha.

i love how the movie is played out though.
a well outed dyke (excuse my language:p) Randy meets popular&smart straight(until proven otherwise) Evie && have an "adventure"...a love adventure :]

its cute.
diverse.
&controversal.