Yesterday I went to enterprise studies working group. I found out there
I had to make a decision on joining a project group as soon as I arrive.
Well I joined a record company project. I am yet to find out more about the
project and what sorts of helps are required. I was asked to join them at
next meeting on Wednesday during Spring break.

I did couple sections of Database homeworks; I was feeling a bit tired and sleepy.

I am still coping with my hang over and in digest, I got from my ordinary day at school. I went to a business school organized workshop. I needed an inspiration and a wake up about my future career. Three very fine motivational speakers, delivered a first batch of wake up call that day. I got more than I bargain for. The last speaker of the day were talking about how one could courage themself toward a desirable goal in life, whether it is personal or professional fullfillments. She reminded us to de-attach ourselves from anythings hurtful, whether it is a negative comments or internalized nagativity. That was the only message I am gonna remember from that day. DE-ATTACH!

Lastnight I happened to be in Merchant City for my dinner at Subway. I decided to went into Polo for a "quick drink". I was totally pettrified and almost freaked out. It had been almost five months since I was there on Friday. I ran into plenty of regulars. That cute boy behind the bar still has sanity intacts. There is a new boy the cloak room. My only company there was Jamie in Mobile MSN. The distraction got the better of me I got another bottle of Miller and banished by belongs into the cloak room. I ran into Wendy and her pal. Wendy is very charming lady, she is possibly my mom age. They're both possible on the same diet: self-imposed starvation. She offered me somethings which I politely declined. I just went wondering around.

I have been working so hard over the past few days to finish up my homework.
I some how manage to miss another assignment deadline. I am well pissed off
when I got up this morning to find out I missed my logic homework hand-ins.
Well it's my second attempt for this class. There is still another assignment.
for this class. I might have to do an extra course work this summer. That means
I won't graduate from the undergraduate college until November.

I was fiddling about in my backpack to look for my ipod. I didn't find it, but instead I found a various notes I wrote for journal entries. My time management has been less than perfect. I am always busy doing "nothing". I am bit tired actual, I am trying to be at so many places at once. Reflexive endeavors like journaling and therapy are so difficult. I went to my own church on Sunday for the firsttime, since the winter break. Some folks already forgot my name and who I was.

this is a conversation between by me and my friends, however names have been changed to protect their privacies
Cayde - I want to be a harpist/harper says:

hey Randy

Randy.... says:

Howdy

Cayde - I want to be a harpist/harper says:

I am pissed and amused at the same time

Cayde - I want to be a harpist/harper says:
:)
Randy.... says:

Whats up?/

Cayde - I want to be a harpist/harper says:

I recieved my distributed systems homework back from Jinni (graduate school's marker) yesterday morning. She congratuated me on another piece of good work. I was happy and joyous - it was the happiest day since the less successful Database report was returned.

I suddenly sunk into loneliness - there was no one there who can truely understand what these achievements really mean to me to congratulate me. I finally emerged from the emotional stage and proceeded to the gym. I completed the work out program, although I got through it at slightly lower intensity, than the original figures on the program.

I am feeling strangely empty, after I turned in the assignment.
I am no longer compelled
to be be in front a computer. But yet I cannot think about finding anythings
useful to do for the rest of the day.

Marc finally answered his phone. I didn't send him a message when I saw
his Gaydar profile set to online. He sounded really sleepy; I only just
said hey and hung up.

I only have a couple of hours to kill. I guess I can go home to see my dad

I am sitting here in an empty office tower, while I listenning the usual anythings that I can get my hands on NPR.org. My favorite program is currently Wait Wait Don't Tell Me. I stumbled across the syndicates during the height of debates about same-sex marriage in the United States. I usually start my day with either Morning Edition or All Things Consider. I finish my day by downloading Pop cultures on to my cellphone.

I went home to see grandpa and father yesterday night. I decided not to come back to Glasgow. I have stacks of T-shirts, but not a single pair of pants in my closet at home. Shirt looks a bit creased but not really dirty. I thought what's heck it's gonna be covered with a sweater anyway. I got back into town at 10 a.m. this morning just a hour before the class. I walked around with my dad before I went into college.

I spent my Friday night alone at my grandfather's house. Actually I spent
the whole weekend inside the house without going out. I am still making a
decision which house I should return to.

I didn't sleep in my room, instead - I made a bed in our living room in
front of the television. It was colder in the bedrooms, plus I felt more
alone in my bedroom. Grandpa was supposed to arrive on Saturday morning

I am still feeling fresh and relax, which is strangely enough for a Friday, when I usually felt totally weakened, defeated and tired by all sorts of resposibility.

I submitted my Programming homework and then walked out the *Nix meeting. It was really a social gathering rather than anythings else now a day. I am planning to bring some homeworks and other work related stuffs over next time. KennyD wasn't there. And I didn't event miss him. One of our mutual friends asked me where he was. I pretended not to hear it. Well I wish I could just told them that I had no clue and we stopped seeing each other. But some how I decided not to because, most of these guys didn't know we were dating each other. It would certainly raise all sorts of questions and issues. I just kept quiet.

"Moan and Groan, bitching the day way that's so stereotypcial of gay boys" This was reply to Adrian greeting "Good Moaning". I started my day with watching a couple of videos on video.google.com. I could only remember the first it was Fear of Girls.

It's about two dorks sharing a house - who describe themselves as a platonic life partner. I don't such platonic relationship can never exist in my life. I had a crush on Marc and dated him once. That didn't work out - we some how stayed friends after that.