Hello. I don't usually write much because not many people read my
journal entries. It's all okay. Just like that song "Hand In My Pocket".
Alanis Morissette wrote it and it goes with all sorts of clashing
emotions and conditions and she sums it up in the chorus by saying
that everything's going to be fine. I guess that's how things are going
around here. My friend, Mandy and her boyfriend are have problems and

Hello. I've been gone a while and I'm
sorry for not writing. Not much has
changed since I last wrote. I'm still
single and searching for the perfect
guy. But the reason I left is that I
found other forums and places to write.
And I never really had much to talk
about here. So I moved to:

www.queerattitude.com
www.myspace.com/eight_easy_steps
www.thegyc.com

I guess I've been everywhere, but this

...are mine! I cut up the pants last night and turned them into material.
I took parts of the pants legs and turned them into bracelets. I'm
wearing them now! They look incredible! I also cut out the pockets and
gave them back to Gabe. I don't know what else to do with the pants
though. I'll find something though! Jean material is incredibly tough!

For the past couple of days, Toni has not been in school. I've never

Hello. Yesterday, I didn't really get a chance to write in my
journal. I didn't want to stay in the library. Everything there
is now so quiet since they put up the rule where you have to have
a pre-signed pass from a teacher before you sign into the library.
Now nobody stays there and it gets so quiet, it drives me crazy.
So I just looked at my inbox and the journal entries that I wrote
the morning before yesterday to see if anybody posts. Not many

I haven't written in 5 days. I was at home for Thanksgiving Vacation.

Wednesday: Nothing really much happened on that day. I was home alone
with my little brother and I think I put my friend Mandy and her
boyfriend Kyle on the Sims 2. They are an extremely crazy (and rich)
pairing.

Thursday: Thanksgiving. I spent that day doing nothing but video
games. Later we had a dinner among my family including my Mom, Kurt

The year is 199X. Two boys are sitting in front of a tree. One
of them climbed up the tree and said, "Hey! I can see my house
from here!"

The other boy said, "Well, of course you can see your house from
here. Your house is right next to this tree up the hill."

The boy in the tree is Nathan. He is 7 years old. The boy leaning

Maxed-out paranoia coursing through my veins,
stomach-clenching regurgitating outbursts,
everyday troubled heart-aches and searing pains,
angst-ridden choices of picking out shirts,
(just to impress him)

Tapped into emotions and tapped out reality,
mindless self-indulgent cries for love-drunk shots,
tears of anger and cursed out rage and anguish,
rage broken out through banging of proverbial pots,

Lately, a lot of negative things have been on my mind. For example,
I have been having a streak of low grades lately. I'll tell you the
list:
English- 80-something
Science- I forgot
Spanish- 80- thanks for dropping that forgotten test, Mrs. Pecheone
n_n
Global- 79- might go up to 80 because Mr. C. feels sorry for me ??
Math B- 79- Bad test grades and forgotten homework takes a toll on
you.

I know you are there. I haven't seen you in ages and I barely see you
anymore. I notice how you've changed and how tall you've gotten. But
you still don't notice me. What happened to the relationship that
we once had. You were my best friend and nothing could've changed
it. But now we are opposites and I know that nothing can change that.
T_T

Today (as usual) not much happened. Yeah, right! Of course something
happened today or I wouldn't be posting about it! Today was "Mix-It-
Up Day". This is when people leave their groups and talk to people
they don't really know. Of course we're mixing it up by doing the
opposite of the opposite. And so we stayed together. It was all of
us except Toni who may be sick and we don't know about it. And so

My friends and I are having difficulties getting along now. I'm
not having much trouble with anyone except Dairen. Before he had
a crush on Toni, he used to hit me in the back of the head a lot
for being a dumb blond. (I'm a brunette- lol)But my other friend,
Mandy is not happy that Toni and Dairen are not getting along. She
says that Dairen is on the recieving end of anger from Toni
that he does not deserve. But Toni tells me that it's because he

Today is what I would call my day of bad news. I learned that one
of my crushes is dating and the other is straight. I cried my eyes
out in lunch today. It's that Celine Dion song, "All By Myself".
That's what I think it is. It's a beautiful song but if you focus
on the lyrics, it makes you realize everything you don't have.
The key term is Myself. That means that all you have is yourself. I

I know it's early in the morning and not much happens this early
but I feel that this is important to me in a way. This morning in
my first period study hall, my old Global Studies teacher, Mrs.
Doughty walked in to the study hall and talked to Mr. Coriale
until she saw me and I got the oppurtunity to talk to her. I talked
to her about all of the things that have changed since she left
early last year for retirement. I told her about how Mandy and I