Just a note -- This is an old poem I wrote about the time I sent a letter to a guy at school, telling him I had feelings for him, and mainly about the call I made to make sure he had gotten it. If y'all want more background, just say so in a post and I'll tell you the whole sob story.

I called you Friday night
To ask if you had received
My death-to-sender letter.
Your mom answered the phone

First, bad news (because I like to leave things with a lighter note). Finals are coming up, and I am unsure if I will be able to get all my labs done. If I don't, I can't take the chemistry final. nrg.

Good news. . .my trannie friend Banessa talked me into signing up for the "Miss gay teen pride" Drag show contes and the winner gets to ride on a float for the gay pride parade that is coming up. :)

God damn it. I can't access oasismag.com from home anymore until my Dad fixes the stupid --see title--. Nrg! So, anyway, I am not going to be able to post as often as I like. :( :(

Thanks to all who posted on my rant about a lack of guys on this site, LOVE YOU ALL!!!! :)

Hey y'all. Not putting this down as a rant, 'cause I am not that angry. But anyway, (and I beleive jeff alluded to this problem before) people are not including there genders in their bios. I don't hink we need to bring up our genders in ou posts, it's just that when someone says something interesting, I like going to their bio page to see what kind of people they are. The sad thing is, not enough people are filling out their bio pages. I often don't know if I am talking to a male or a female, foget aabout lesbian, gay, bit, trannie, I just want to know are you a guy or a girl? And even if you are trannie and/or gen\der queer, say so in your bio. You don't have to write a freaking book, just a line or two to say where you feel you are in the lgbt spectrum. What is there to be afraid of here? We accept all of y'all for however y'all are.

I'm sorry, but as a gay man, I just have to be honest that I really like meeting other gay guys, be it in person or via the internet. So why is it that at least 80-90% of the people I come across and/or newcomers are female?? Please note I am NOT saying that I wish there were less of y'all, just more men than there currently is. Any gay/bi guys reading this PLEASE post so I don't feel so alone.

Anybody here from NY? Like me? And if so, could you say what region of NY?

To all who I have been an absolute bitch too, I am truly sorry. I invite everyone to tear apart my poetryto shreds if they wish. Bring it on!!!!!

Wow ash-z. I thought you were above being nasty. . .You proved me wrong. I apologized to you iver the small spat we had over selekta's rant. If you had read that, you may have decided not to post waht you did.. But, its too late. Like I said, the biggest wounds are often caused by words instead of swords. You want me to tear apart your poetry? I am not going to stoop to that level. All I wanted was some little tidbits of how I could grow as a writer, not all this junk you and selekta are throwing at me. I thought you were friendly, but I guess not.

It is sad to me that you have no feelings whatsoever about the emotions of others. How can one have true friends if all one does is think about oneself?

Too all who dislike my poetry. . .why all this anger? Do I walk around yelling at you, telling you how sbad I think your poetry is? No. Because I value creativity. I value self-expression. You spokeyour enemies exposing themselves, ash-z; well I see that you are an angry, hurt, individual, who can only express her sadness through lashing out at others. You spoke of two-bits losing value; well I don't see your bits, no matter how much you put in, have any value.

Shout out to all my New York homies (or is it homos? lol). Literally just got back from the 3-hour ride to Albany, where the whole convention was held. It was fun, saw how divers the community was, ans all that fabulous jazz.

On a slightly different note, met a GORGEOUS bi-guy from Long Island. . .too bad he lives so far away. . .(makes sad little sigh). He was really smat too, which I find to be immensly attractive. He's a good kisser too (could I ask for more?). Hope to keep up some kind of correspondence with him, even if it's just through e-mail and phone calls, he is a really intrigueing guy (and did I mention GORGEOUS?).

Two bodies side by side
Sharing this intimacy.
Two heads lean closer
Mounting anticipation.
Friction betwixt cheeks
Signals the commencement.

Mouth to mouth
Breath to breath
Two tongues become acquainted
Each vying for supremacy
But enjoying immensely
The struggle they share.

Hey y'all. I'm kinda depressed over David. He definitely knows I'm gay, but shows no interest whatsoever. boohoo. And the chance of something happening akin to all those gay romance novels is really infinitismally small.

Hope is sun
Brightly shining
Majesticly illuminating
Creating a masterpiece of nature
That would put Monet himself to shame.

You are the hope I see on my verdant horizon.

Dear David,

I stand here before you now
Drenched
By all the memories I've cried.
I hold my hand out to you
Starved
By all the cheap men I've tried.

Please hear
With an open heart
Please read
Don't tear apart

My message is for you
What are you gonna do?
Yell at me
Kick at me
Spill my blood on the floor?
Or heal me
Feel for me
Hold hands as we go outdoors?

I have one more thing to say
Before I stop writing today:

I beleive you to be beautiful.

Sincerely,
Ghosba sensei

I was just looking over all the poetry I have written on this site, and I think "wow, I have gotten so much better than when I started writing earlier this year (I have only started posting recently, in relative terms). My enlish teacher is going to let me use some of my poetry for my end-of-year portfolio, even though he never assigned the poetry, I just wrote it because I wanted to. I love posting on this site, but I wish that people who would read my stuff would comment more often (I would be cool with someone saying they hated my poems, as long as someone out there is reacting to my works, I feel I have done my job as an artist).

Hey, does anybody else here who is out at school have this problem where people at school automatically expect you to be like the gay stereotype? I know people who are like "OMG you're the gay guy right? Tell me all about your gay lifestyle!" (No that is not a literal translation, put you get it) It's like they expect me to be totally different from them, and when they realize that I am not like someone on 'Will and Grace,' they get bored with me.