arent u happy =] shit scared me lol i gotta start saving screen names down next time this site goes down see theres to many gay people the site cant handle it =]

well i missed u all lol

Black out : Heres a free style coming from the heart...all happening while the lights are out.

i'll live for the sunrises and sunsets
still standing here after all the regrets
no matter how hard it gets

Tears will go away like clorox versus stains
No matter how much i try the feeling still remains

How the moon shines and creates its own reflection
shining down on the ocean showing you complete perfection

Luckoy: im so lonely
Luckoy: i think im getting feelings for my pillow
sHoRtPinAyLuV: HAHAH LoL
sHoRtPinAyLuV: well ur pillow will never hurt u
sHoRtPinAyLuV: so dats a good thing
Luckoy: lol =P
sHoRtPinAyLuV: LoL
sHoRtPinAyLuV: humm pillow love
sHoRtPinAyLuV: never heard of that
Luckoy: its a great love

-- i have nothing to say...how about i do a poem for you real quick?

Pillow Love -- lol ahaha iono i had to pick a topic =]

i wait for someone so devine
To shine in this life of mine
wherever you are just give me a sign
ill stand here waiting even after the clock strikes nine
till my fingers can intertwine
with your hand
so here i stand

Time will stay still
its your love my heart will fill
ill do my share
treat you like my own carebear
with you in my life no one else can compare
so baby give me a chance
walk the beaches and have romance

So as far as my day goes its been good i probably went 5 hours without my ex calling, why is it that the person you don't want` wants you & the person you want to hold so much doesn't feel the same. So if you have kept up with the past posts that i have written =] you will come to find that my ex is in town and wants to meet up. She called me up last night and asked again when i was busy and i instead of answering this time i stayed quiet and she asked me why i was quiet, i thought about it and asked her why she is going to come back and act like nothing happend when she left and she didn't say anything and i said im sorry if im acting like a bitch but the shit u did my heart still hasn't recovered and we can go on acting like nothing happend but i know thats not how u are. She agreed with me and i was in total shock cause she actually agreed with me. So i decided to meet up with her tonight just to talk for a while then leave i know im breaking my promise...but i don't want her thanksgiving vacation to suck and i guess inside im not that kind of person.

Well what to write? i have one =]
CHECK UR INBOXES PEOPLE!!! IT WILL ALWAYS SAY (0)

i seem to always write my shit at night and then people make there other shit and mines just goes down the list and
i think people don't have enough time to like read it...thats not cool -___-''

i came up with a tongue twister ; anenome`eminem ; anenome`eminem

its the cause of watching finding nemo and turning to mtv and having eminem in a micheal jackson outfit

Well i haven't posted in a while so i decided to atleast write something to let people know that im still here kickin it. I'm still single yess...ahaha thats actually something i shouldn't be laughing about the fact that i think im going physco of being this lonely. I got a haircut today and dyed my hair again because the roots are showing but yeah...school is fine im actually trying to get higher than a c in my classes because i heard colleges look at your sophmore year a lot in ur transcript. Im talking to a lot of people but it's at a point where im never gonna get attached. Over the years ive learned not to get attached the fact that it hurts to much if something does happen but after a while i do, its not a crime is it =\? At this point im just talking to guys because i don't know any girls, not counting the ones i know online but yeah. I guess for a while im just gonna relax and not do shit. I'm thinkin about going to this gay parade happening sometime this summer here in seattle maybe ill find a juliet? =] I'm also listening to a lot of teckno ive memorized most of the rap songs and can sing the slow jams but trance just fascinates me. Yes im wierd...I'm working out a lot mostly on my tripcepts trying my best to get these flabby arms toned. I'm not planning anything ahead so ill update u when things happen. I doubt anyone will read this far but yeah im just taking in the smell of the flowers for now till i have someone to give flowers too.

So im here...waiting. For what you say? I have no idea maybe you can answer that question better than me. I have no idea whats goin on around the next bend but i guess thats what life is all about unknown situations. New surprises. To cross obstacles and live through all the drama and bullshit God may throw at us. And i will be here waiting for what ever may happen being ready for whats next in my life. The new chapter and i will survive to right about it. Through it all i want someone to hold. To whisper secrets too. You see im a romantic and right now i have no one to romance with...no one to snuggle with. Im slowly wrinkling up into a little ball, you might as well throw me into a garbage can after this is all done. For now ill be doing nothing but living my life and doing what i gotta do to live. Breathin eating all that junk tryin to get in better shape. Me and my bestfriend have been talkin on the phone for 8 hours and more half of it she's been talking about her boyfriend. I was gonna hang up earlier so she could call back her friend but she didn't want me too. She's stupid like that very greedy about me i don't know why she's a dork. My ex is coming back thanksgiving from cali i know she'll want to chill but my relationship with her was nothing but physical attraction, and she is pretty but her bitch side makes her ugly and right now i don't wanna deal with it. So ill stay sober and stay low till she leaves for cali again. Yupp yupp thats about it people.

The reason we didn't go out is because we didn't wanna risk our friendship well actually she didn't wanna risk out friendship because she just kissed a girl that day while i was all out fine with it ready to jump to any risk but i knew i had to be loyal. But i guess when i came back from away and read the messages she left me about what she did that day. I was surprised at how fast i broke. I don't know why before we both came out to each other she would always tell me about her days and how she made out with someone but never have i been so torn up.

All I have are dark and lonely days
Cuz the sun don't shine my way

I'm at a point in my life where i know theres a missing piece of my heart
and even though i have knowledge of that, where can i start so i can finish this puzzle
It's like my life is a painting the big picture is beautiful but i want to look closer in it
i want to look at the details that creates that masterpiece. I don't know if any of you feel the same way or if you even know what im trying to say but to put it in simpler terms ; i just want someone to hold.

I just need someone to hold in the rainy days [considering the fact that i do live in seattle]
i want someone to call up when i wake up in the morning and just say hi
or to talk to before i go to sleep and wish sweet dreams too
someone to snuggle up with during a scary movie
even someone who'll be willing to lay on the grass outside and look at the stars
even though sometimes those stars end up moving and it turns out its a plane

I know a lot of people are mad because of Bush winning this election...again. But i just want to say to a lot of you who are thinking about the M-ban that we don't need shit to prove that we love someone. We don't need legal documents to know that the person we are with is the love of our lives. All we need is our hearts and thats something that Bush or glb haters can take away from us.

4YEARSARESHORTWHENYOURINHEAVEN & YOUDON'TNEEDPAPERSTOGETIN.

I was eating...(yes i love food) when you remind me of a girl starts playing in my pocket, just to find out the girl ive been wanting to hold in my arms for so long is calling me, so i pick up and she goes what are u doing like she always does and i answer with food food still in my mouth and she laughs, i love her laughs its something that would turn any frown into a smile =] and thats only her laugh. She has many different kinds but lets not get into that. So she ask's me what im doing today and i go iono im kinda lazy and she tells me about the things that have been going on and i tell her nothing because ive been doing nothing just trying to stay sober. She ask's me if i wanted to come over and i say no because i might go somewhere else and she goes okay, she wanted me to watch a walk to rememember with her and just to spend time with each other since we haven't seen each other in like 2 months. I miss her...i really do i just was already planning to do something so then she said she had to go and she would call me back...and she did then i had to go so i told her i would call her back and i did after i went trick or treating with my lil sis. I was a pumpkin if anyone is wondering =). I talked to her for an hour or so which isn't as long as our old convos use to be i saw the previews for the incredibles and i asked her if she wanted to go with me this friday to go watch it and she said yes, and i guess i really wanna know wut will happen while were watching it. She has to many people she loves and so many people who wanna hook up and holler. And theres me her bestfriend what would stick me out from the rest u know? if only there was another chick i knew that would love me like i loved her life would be full of smiles...but as for now ill keep livin it up eating my burgers and fries.