The ex, again.

the mouse that roared — Sun, 04 May 2008 16:40:48 -0400

My ex-girlfriend walked into the dining hall this morning, walked into brunch with a girl at her side.

Her one and only best friend is in Mongolia, so it's not like this girl is a friend. As far as I can tell.

Running Away

the mouse that roared — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 20:09:55 -0400

I think I'm gonna leave college, go take time off. This year has ended on such a shit note with such few real friends, and the rest of the year wasn't really bubbly. It's not like I've found a girlfriend that's normal, no, I've only maybe had three crushes since I've been here, and maybe one of those could have turned to love.

college and its myth of sparkling intellectualism: my miserable disillusionment

the mouse that roared — Mon, 31 Mar 2008 00:29:39 -0400

I thought college would be a bastion of spirited intellectualism, that there would be so many more people like me, that I would love my classes. There would be vibrant lectures and debates, I would think deeply about hard issues every day, I would go to art shows and concerts and plays, I would play music, write music, sing music, become a poet.

Oy. Down the confusion road again.

the mouse that roared — Sun, 23 Mar 2008 23:57:21 -0400

So I know I like women. Some women. Haven't met one right one yet, or anything. I don't even like stereotypical beauty, but I have liked women for a long, long time.

Ironing

the mouse that roared — Sat, 01 Mar 2008 19:50:44 -0500

I said goodbye in a gaze thirty-seven degrees away from your eyes on my sockets;
In short words in short sentences:
“We’ll chill, it’ll be cool.”
(my hands dove in my pockets as if it were your cheekbones they were holding)
words full of curdled nectar, fermentation of old pumping blood.

You ironed on a smile that
Saw in my lips those vines you wound about my heart.

A lesson in not hooking up with best friends

the mouse that roared — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 16:43:16 -0500

So we had the day off of classes yesterday. And my friends and I decided it would be a good idea to get crazy drunk the night before. One girl--Diamond, we'll call her--procured some delicious rum from the Bahamas (from a previous hookup in her dorm), and four queer, single girls proceeded to down an inordinate amount of generously measured shots.

Binding--please read

the mouse that roared — Mon, 11 Feb 2008 12:08:23 -0500

I wrote this for my poetry class (it's supposed to be a prose outpouring on a body part). What do you all think?

Plain Clothes

the mouse that roared — Tue, 01 Jan 2008 19:42:00 -0500

I long for intensity
the way I ache
for sex.

One in my heart, squeezed in a juicer and
left to sit,

One in my gut, gobs of clay longing wrapped
to my ribs and
opening my lips
chapped with kissing.

And my refusal to love ordinary isn't snobbery,
it's simmering stronger than tea, than tomato soup,
heavier than the buzz of alcohol.

First Breakup

the mouse that roared — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 13:43:43 -0400

Well, that girl and I broke up. We still get along. It's weird not touching or kissing, but we'll get used to it. Yesterday she hung out with her ex and I couldn't take it and she said that maybe it wouldn't work and I agreed. But she wants to keep it open, and I tried to break it more cleanly.

I believe we shall still be best friends.

In Which Mouse is Incapable of Making Good Decisions and Kisses This Girl a Lot

the mouse that roared — Tue, 02 Oct 2007 14:42:19 -0400

So I'm dating this girl. As of two evenings ago. I enjoyed hanging out with her when I met her at college; she's this cool playwright who is very energetic and dynamic and talks all the time, but in a good way because she has so much to say.

Trans

the mouse that roared — Sat, 15 Sep 2007 11:16:23 -0400

So here I am, at the lesbian capital of the world, in the lesbianest college. Finished my first week of classes. Love the environment. Wear overalls all the time. Meet a lot of girls, have a few gay friends, a lot of straight ones live in my dorm. As far as I can tell anyway. Long story short, I'm actually fitting in comfortably.

college!

the mouse that roared — Thu, 23 Aug 2007 00:48:16 -0400

I'm going! To college! In five days!

Smith, of course, which is excellently queer. We shall see how the all-girls' thing pans out.

I love my state!

the mouse that roared — Fri, 15 Jun 2007 01:34:49 -0400

The legislature in MA today voted to keep same-sex marriage, not to vote on it. No stress, not even a debate. The future of gay marriage in MA is pretty certain now. Love love love MA!!! And Deval, too, of course. If Mitt was still around, he'd lobby to vote on this when everyone was planning on banning gay marriage.

Vote for the best coming-out T-shirt! Feel free to critique.

the mouse that roared — Sun, 20 May 2007 00:10:50 -0400

* I came out and all I got was this lousy T-shirt\n* Love is love is love in rainbow colors\n* Heterosexually challenged\n* Rainbow carrot (I work on a farm)\n* Red/Orange/Yellow/Green/Blue/Purple in different colors than they actually are\n* Sappho is my homegirl\n* No one knows I'm queer\n* I don't mind straight people as long as they act gay in public\n* Oklahoma-style: I've got a beautiful feeling everyone's turning out gay\n* Those 50's style "I've got a sin coming on" postcards, except with a girl\n

Heroism and Embroidered Chairs

the mouse that roared — Fri, 30 Mar 2007 15:45:36 -0400

Fiction absolute. That’s what he called it, reading Tom Wolfe in English class that day. Fiction absolute. As I was reading I wanted to underline it, but I’d forgotten my pencil. Everyone has their own worldview that places their group—or groups—in the best light.