It sounds such a fucking stupid thing to get bothered by. So stupid and superficial I'll agree. It's just that every year, without fail, I've remembered my friend's birthday's and bought them presents- no matter how much I had to save or go without something I wanted. I always got them something, and I did it on time.

So this is the final straw really, the fact that they have decided that I don't get a present because THEY want something, but of course- they're sorry so it's all OK right? Well yeah, under normal circumstances I'd say it's a problem that can happen to anyone. Hell I'm skint half of the time, so I can't exactly start moaning because I don't get a prezzie right?

Yay! On Wednesday, I finally saw the new serires of the L Word. I don't know how far behind I am, and I think this episode was the first one of the new series, but I just have to say: OMFG- I'm still madly crushing on Shane! I didn't know I still was, and then I saw her and couldn't take my eyes away from the screen at all :D So yeah, I'll admit this is a pointless entry- I just have to spread the love of Shane around. Gotta love the new opening sequence too!

Avalanche is sullen and too thin
She starves herself to rid herself of sin
And the kick is so divine when she sees bones beneath her skin
And she says:
Hey baby can you bleed like me?
C'mon baby can you bleed like me?

Chris is all dressed up and acting coy
Painted like a brand new Christmas toy
He's trying to figure out if he's a girl or he's a boy
He says:
Hey baby can you bleed like me?

Yep, it's true- I < 3 Becky! (Geddit???) Today she came up to me in science and said something along the lines of, "Lisa my sweetest darling love, here's that CD." I took the copy of Garbage: Blled Like Me (awesome album) and felt my heart all fluttery and my stomach all churny as we touched. Goddess, why does she have to be straight :(

When I came home, I read my Quizilla messages- and there's a reply fro, Becky saying we should go to Star Wars this Saturday and then she goes on talking about Garbage and how, if she was a lesbian, she'd marry Shirley Manson. So at least she's open minded- which is pretty hoopy :-)

Lowdown: I fancy Becky, she is straight. Becky doesn't know I'm gay, but may slightly suspect. Becky deosn't know I like her anything more than a friend. We're not even that close- just basically "Hiya" and stuff.

So here's the message she sent on Quizilla:
"i think that we should go to star wars together but dont expect me to sit on the back row with you because i know how your mind works..."

I was working in the library today, and I was left alone in the stockroom for a bit. As is usual for me, I started to daydream- and had the most vivid fantasy about a beautiful girl. I don't know her in real life, but I made up that we're girlfriends. So, anyway, here it is:

Amber (I just love this name so that's what I called her!)
She's a little taller than me, probably 5ft 7, and curvy. She has long red hair, down to her waist, which is still perfectly tidy even though she’s probably been working all morning. She's wearing a funky outfit, consisting of a see through blouse and a skirt that ends just above the knee, but it's her socks that really show off her wild side- knee length and brightly coloured. She wears clumpy black school shoes- which she kicks off as she pulls herself onto the side.

Did the second German exam, a listening one. I probably screwed up- seeing as I think I did OK! That's usually the case, but I'm not too worried- as I can retake next year if it's too bad.
I mostly remember coming out of the exam, looking down at a desk I was passing and seeing NIRVANA etched into the wood, along with a gravestone bearing 'R.I.P Kurt Cobain' which put a smile on my face for a while :-)

Just a little note on my accidental coming out to the entire P.E class. Yousee, I was on the trampolines yesterday (see previous journal entry for more info) and the teacher told me to stand straight so I said, stupidly, "Me? Straight? Yeah right!" Cue a few giggles and my bright red face, hoping they just thought it was all a joke. Plus the girl I'm crushing on was there- so damn damn damn damn!