well i think it's going to suck, but academically of course, well at least i'll get to see my friends and just observe the student body. i wish i was better in math, i just feel like such a failure in math, oh well. i wish i could be better academically, i'm failing two courses i think. i guess i just have to stick it out.

today was nice. well i went with my dad to get some record albums and a hardcover Bible. i feel a little off, as if i forgot to do something, but not. probably just the little situation here at home. nothing with me but just my dumb sister, my sister can really ruin a good time. but oh well.

it's raining and the worries of school are away. i might be failing music theory... but hey at least all my other classes will be fine (i can always make it up). i have started to get more into the Holy Bible, man what a great thing that book is... when ever i look into my favorite psalms i just feel good, i know it's weird to be religious these days but hey. what isn't weird these days?

i just ignored my enemy in class and it went well. :) i'm not stressed about that anymore (just ignore him) but now i have music theory homework. i have to compose a 40 measure piece using only the key of C Major. also now i have to do another in F Major. :( it's hard since our sub doesn't know that some of the people in the class aren't very good with sight reading. especially me. :( i wish the music theory class was easier, of course it was an advanced placement class.

my sworn enemy has transeferred into my class. as if the music theory homework and the bad grade in english weren't enough he had to get into my class. it's a bad day... ok maybe not bad but it's still not that great. i've recently been thinking about making amends but i don't think he would even begin to hear me out. i just wish we could get that hate out of our lives and just move on.

today was very emotional (not in a bad way). anyway today i wasn't paranoid about the cops (yay!). classes went fine. the weird guy who sits at my table pissed of some other people so we just told them we weren't associated with him in anyway (lol). MUSIC THEORY! OMG! so anyway mr. music teacher won't be there for 2 weeks, yay! anyway one of the band directors told us to go to the band hall and just have a "quiet study hall" which of course meant chill and do whatever. so anyway this bird busted out on the piano and played the theme from Titanic.

anyway today i was walking to class and i saw three cops... tried to think nothing of them and not make eye contact. then i heard "HEY HEY YOU!" and i was like "Damn they're calling me." i'm always the easy target. and i saw them and they looked at me weird, and they just didn't say anything. so i walked away and i was freaked out. in 1st period i couldn't stop shaking. 2nd period, i need to pee three times. 3rd period, i was moslty dehydrated. 4th period i was ready to drop. 5th period i was refreshed a bit by lunch but i could hardly eat.

i like to be philosophical... well today it was raining. in lunch there was a leak in the ceiling and it was coming through those cardboard- like tiles. so a janitor put a bucket (a very large one) under it and poked the tile with a broom handle. and seemingly out-of-nowhere this gush of water came flowing out into the bucket everyone was like "man, i'm going to graduate from this place?". :) it was very funny.

yeah. so i was listening to some Beck, and i saw the documentary "10 Years of Mellow Gold"... anyway that was yesterday. at 10:00 P.M. i just started to bust out some of my old folk tunes. i didn't play guitar all day yesterday so i just let all the excess creativity flow. so now i might go back to my musical roots and get back on the folk singer wagon.

i haven't been paying much attention to my folk guitar. i wonder if i should give it up. i haven't wrote many songs recently. i just feel like i'm being unfair since my classical guitar gets much more attention from me. i know it seems silly, but i don't want to give up being a folk singer. it's very complex, it's not a huge problem eating away at me but i'm wondering if anyone could give me some advice.

today everyone had to stay in the classrooms because there were skunks roaming aroud one of the buildings. can you believe that? it's for real. well anyway it's raining here, and lute music is great to listen to right now. i'm very contented right now. these last few days have been very pleasent and mellow. oh how i cherrish days like these when everything goes the way i'd like them too. today i brought my classical guitar and hung out with some new people (musicians of course). gosh life right now is just fine, after all my life has not been this pleasent and calm in long time.

today was a very good day. my classes were easy for some reason. in music theory there were 3 new students and so now we start at day one (music teacher was not happy). physics was easy for the first time. everything else was very mellow like the strings of a bass. had homework... it was easy. it was math homework and i just used my computer to solve the problems. i have internet on my new computer now. YAY! i played some classical guitar on the porch. and i'm going to do some chat rooms and watch television.

today was not so bad. i don't have my supplies for some classes but to hell with it. Music Theory was not so bad. i found out that the football game on friday had a bit of unsportsman like activity. one of the players from the other school was a bit mad at another player on our side and he decided to beat up the player who commited the offense. our team lost as ussual, but whatever. i got to talk a bit with one of my teachers and just hang out after school, talking politics and music. then one of my friends brought his ukelele, which was nice. it's good to see some variety once in a while.

i have to go back to hell (school) tomorrow. i always knew my senior year would be a nightmare. it's a nightmare and i can't wake up. i feel so inadequate, it's like the song "Goin' nowhere fast" won't leave me alone... because i'm living it. i can't wait for the three day weekend coming up. i just need time to collect my thoughts, since my brain was overloaded this week. i pinched myself in Music Theory too see if i'd awake, but to no avail i stayed where i was. the only difference was i had a few broken blood vessels on my arm.

Anonymous: Coranto (ms. Board, fr.36r)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LP1De0I1Zfg&feature=PlayList&p=7845F68976...
my favorite lute song. i hope to one day play it... only in a day dream i can. i can't dream about something like that. i can dream about really messed up stuff, but never anything nice... i wonder why.