It's been a while...

DesuCake9000Cheez — Thu, 31 Jul 2008 11:49:00 -0400

A lot's happened since I last posted.
After my last post, I finally went to pick up my parts; It took a day to build my computer, which didn't work, and then the rest of the week to figure out I missed the LPT cable >.>
This computer's a lot faster, and has better internet connection, Hooray!

After that I headed off to summer camp.

Continuing from yesterday...

DesuCake9000Cheez — Wed, 2 Jul 2008 10:34:52 -0400

I know I said I'd have a class about now, but it was really vague for what I signed up for- when I got there, turns out it was remedial English, so I'm not going there anymore, hooray!
So anyway, back to the guy I was talking about yesterday (I'll refer to him as J), he's 2 years older than me, and probably the person that made me firmly recognize my sexuality.

Canada Day~

DesuCake9000Cheez — Tue, 1 Jul 2008 23:33:20 -0400

So today was Canada day.
It was fun.
We went out to eat and then went to this big town-wide event
There were fireworks at 10:00, I got there at 8:30, so for and hour and a half I walked around.
There were cheap fairground rides, didn't go on many.
I saw a bunch of people there I knew
Including the hawt Gr8 that i mentioned a couple of entries ago.

Summer!~

DesuCake9000Cheez — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 19:00:50 -0400

It's summer vacation!~
Got my report card back to day.
It was decent- all A's except for Gym, which was a B+ TT_TT
School's over.
Today was a pretty fun last day, cleaned up, played around.
But gosh it was sad watching the Grade 8's leave.
It'll be 3 years till I'll be in high school with them~
I wanted so bad to just make out with S. before school ended, but I didn't.

Graduation ceremony for Gr8's today...

DesuCake9000Cheez — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 20:52:21 -0400

Today our school's Band played for the grade 8's.
Although the main reason I joined this band was to get into the Graduation ceremony.
Tomorrow's the last day of school~
Anyway, it was really fun, playing for them, watching them get awards, but it was really sad knowing that I won't see them for 2 years, and some of them I'd never see again.

Haven't posted in a while, but anyway,

DesuCake9000Cheez — Mon, 23 Jun 2008 18:23:31 -0400

School's ending on Thursday.
And Thursday's a half day.
Summer's gonna suck.
At first I was happy; Now I'm sad.
I don't know how I'm gonna deal without S.
He's so perfect.

The only consolation is that I get to go a summer camp.
10 days away from my parents~Hooray!~

Happy~

DesuCake9000Cheez — Sat, 14 Jun 2008 16:49:01 -0400

So I went over to S.' to finish a project.
Our third group member wasn't there, so it was just me and him.
There were constantly uncomfortable silences, which were, luckily, mostly broken by his younger brother.
It felt really awkward, because I found myself wanting to do things to him I know I shouldn't.
Although we're pretty good friends by now I guess.

Finally~

DesuCake9000Cheez — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 20:07:43 -0400

I finally finished Chinese School for the year ~_~
It's so annoying.
I'm really bad at speaking Chinese, and can hardly read/write it, but my parents insist on "learning a new language" and also insist to put me in the faster class.
My marks were pretty bad, B-/C+'s.
It's finally over

Stereotypes.

DesuCake9000Cheez — Thu, 12 Jun 2008 17:27:15 -0400

I've always been more feminine.
And because of that, I'm apparently "Gay"
I know I am, but I don't think that being feminine makes someone gay.
School REALLY sucks for me.

Hooray!

DesuCake9000Cheez — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 19:57:22 -0400

S. is my science partner for a project~
Meant to be done out of class~
That's mandatory~
Now I have an excuse to get his phone number and stuff.
I'm becoming more comfortable with him- it's not as awkward
The school year's ending soon.
And my parents don't like people coming over.
Or me meeting other people.
Unless it's for school.

In School...

DesuCake9000Cheez — Thu, 5 Jun 2008 16:10:45 -0400

So during Health class today our teacher talked about sexuality to us, and S. reacted strongly in a negative sense and glanced at me.
Is this a good sign?

Also I got S.' email. Hooray!

I did it.

DesuCake9000Cheez — Wed, 4 Jun 2008 16:22:40 -0400

I came out to a dear friend of mine.
I met him over the internet; I've actually never spoken to him in real life. He's 6 years old than me, and I'm not sure of his sex, although he refers to himself as male. I know him only by his screen name, KirbY.
I met him on a forum my cousin introduced me to known as Keepy Alivey.

So...

DesuCake9000Cheez — Tue, 3 Jun 2008 17:01:43 -0400

So he got glasses the other day.
He's so hot >.<
I really don't feel like I'm making any progress.
I try to be friends with him, but we're so different, so I'm just stuck staring at him; It's unsettling.
At least in Music class I get to sit behind him, regardless if I'm heaving my Alto Sax at the same time. I wish I'd taken flute or clarinet ; I'd have a reason to sit next to him.

Thoughts

DesuCake9000Cheez — Sun, 25 May 2008 22:53:55 -0400

As I walk by you, I make eye contact.
We start talking.

As I'm about to leave, you do something.
Something that shatters my soul, makes me cringe.

You smile.

At first, I'm happy.
But then it clouds over.

Suddenly, I feel different;
Feel thousands of things at once.

Like Pain.

The pain's cold like ice,
But it burns like flame.

I've slipped in a puddle of emotions,

Irreversible

DesuCake9000Cheez — Thu, 8 May 2008 17:54:14 -0400

I look forward,
See a circle of people.
In the middle, a young girl;
A wheelchair is on the ground near her,
It's been pushed over.
Everyone's screaming at her.
Laughing at her.
No one stops them.
No one cares.
She's trying hard to keep back her tears.
Then, someone speaks to me,
Tells me to join in.
I know that if I refuse they'll hurt me, too.
So I join their game.