FRIENDS ARE A BUNCH OF STUPID ASS HOLE!
ALL YOU DO IS BE A FUCKING GOOD ASS FRIEND AND ALL THEY DO IS SCREW YOU OVER.
YOU BE THE NICEST YOU CAN AND ALL THEY DO IS FUCK YOU UP.
I GIVE UP
FOR REAL THIS TIME.
....
..
.
WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU DONT KNOW WHO TO TRUST?
WHEN EVERYONE SEEMS TO BE JUST RADING BEHIND YOUR BACK?
CAN ANYONE JUST BE TRUE?

I hate just rambling about my problems.
But I needed to go to someone or something.
I just want to seem all okay.
But I know you all probably know i'm not.
So i'm sorry.

I feel like everything is falling apart.
Like i'm suddently not good enough.
I hate this feeling.
I'm like a serious depprsent.
And I just want to be happy.
Love just seems to bring problems.
And i'm just scared.
Do you know how hard it is to just want to be happy?
I want to be understood.
I'm so scared and I hate that feeling.
I hate going to the same people for my problems..

Well my close friends were the first to find out.. Then I went on and broke the silence with my Mom..

Over the last few weeks I have been having diffrent types of lesbian fantasies. Some are with people I know, and others are with people I never met. I really enjoy the dream and wonder, why is this keep playing in my mind when i'm asleep?

I have been asking myself lately, 'do I want to live in the life of God?' and all the time the answer is not clear because I find all the negative thoughts from Christians and all the negativity in the bible. I mean, I don't want to be hated by someone who may or may not really exist. I just think.. Don't you want to at least try to live in the life of god?

"your the only one who can make yourself think of bad memories, so just don't think about it and you'll be fine." everyday people are saying things like these as advice without even thinking what if they were in the situation. When you think about it you think, that does make sense but if only life was that simple.

Same-sex in the city
( So your prince charming maybe a Cinderella ) is a awesome book.

i'm back to being single & back to being gay..
yea, thats about it..
how r u all?
merry christmas

I wish with all my heart i could say "i'm a lesbian, deal with it!" but i can't.. and i hate that about me, not being happy wiht who i am..

i dont know why life has to suck so much sometimes...
i hate having so much discrimination in the world..

a lot of times i wonder why am i this way? (why am i gay) an a lot of times i come with the conclusion that i was meant to be this way, and that i should be happy being like this..
but for some reason, i am happy at times but at others i feel so sad for being someone my family (well some of them) didn't want me to end up being..