so lately I've been wondering what it would be like if I became a drag performer. it's odd. I can't really imagine myself in a dress & wig with makeup on. but it looks like fun. don't mind me, I'm being weird. :P

so I've been meaning to post something but I haven't had anything to write about.

let's see... what have I been up to... *thinks*

umm, I've been developing my spiritual practice a bit, adding some new elements to the way I perform rituals and pray and such. it's pretty cool.

I lack a good thought-provoking title for this journal entry. ah well, it doesn't need it.

So I'm back in the States (eww!) after spending 10 days on a tropical island. Puerto Rico's a great place. It's a place of tremendous beauty and rich in culture, and well I'm proud to say I'm Puerto Rican. But enough of that, on to the ramblings.

that's what I feel like I'm doing. mind you, we're only like, what? 2, 3 weeks into summer vacation? (at least for me, mine started June 10th.)

I feel like I should be working. Or hanging out with friends.

Warning! Short theological essay ahead! Brain damage may ensue.

My mother said a very funny thing to me today.

“You know there’s only one God, right? I know you’re curious about all those other religions... but there’s only One True God.”

She points to the crucifix and extends her arms to mimic the death of Christ.

I'm afraid to ask you something very important.

I'm afraid to tell you about the way I feel.

I'm afraid because I don't know if things are going to be different.

The audacity of some people and their lack of concern for the environment... it really pisses me off.

what do you say to someone who apologizes to you months after they hurt you tremendously and now wants to start over? I haven't a clue. I mean, I put the situation behind me now, I'm over it. And now he comes along and apologizes, and wants to start over...

Part of me just wants to go with it, the other part tells me that not to trust him b/c he'll just hurt me all over again.

junior year is over~!

I'm so happy. My last day in that hellhole of a school (OK it's not that bad I admit, but I still hate it) was yesterday. so I went in, sat through an awards ceremony (I was given a perfect conduct award, irony), got my fabulous yearbook, gave back texts, and said bye to some people I won't be seeing until September.

from time to time I wonder about certain things, I mean, we all do. like, what's the meaning of life, what's my destiny, etc.

today, during the car ride home, I started thinking about one question in particular:

why did Goddess make me gay?

if you're religious, you've probably wondered about this at one point. why did God/Goddess/Higher Power make me gay?

something I discovered today.

it's very important to appreciate the simple, almost unnoticed things in life, because they can make you very happy.

school is ehhhhhhhh. I only have 7 or 8 class days left, so... its pretty much over, and I'm happy :]

my life in general is just kinda... I dunno, stagnant? at least to me, any way. there's nothing going on. :\ I'm sick too, I think I have laryngitis. So its very difficult to talk >.>;

so I'm feeling better about myself now. I'm still not that comfortable with my life ATM...there's a few things that need changing, but I'm slowly getting there.

I thought I broke free of this little cycle of feeling hopeless and depressed, but now I feel just as horrible as before, if not worse.

I feel like I've lost all hope...in anything.

I don't see any point to life anymore. I don't see why I should keep living.