Yesterday I went to the LGBT Youth Center nearby, and I had an awesome time!
It's been a long time since I've made a journal entry. It's nice to come back to this site to talk to all of you nice people. I have been dwelling so much on my lonliness that I have been depressing myself. I'm coming out of it though. I also found a couple of trans people who live near me! It's incredible!
I am just entirely depressed. I've been thinking wayyyy too much about my gender identity, and it's giving me ulcers. The problem is that I can't stop, and I want some peace of mind. My mom has been trying to be helpful, but she forgets every stinking time she tells me she'll spend time with me to figure it all out. I'm so depressed, that I'm actually laughing.
This is my first poem... I think ever. It sounds more like a riddle. I don't know how to construct poems very well, but I can rhyme, so here it goes:
I look in the mirror, I see what you see
But what I can see is inside of me
That part I can see is invisible to you
Though you would never guess unless I gave you a clue.
My actions and thoughts are not the same
Well, I guess it wasn't meant to be. I was supposed to go to my first GLBT group today, but apparently I got the dates mixed up, so I'll have to try again in a couple of weeks.
I am also bored, and in inspiration of lost_in_wonderland, I will also tell you all random facts about me.
-I'm 5' 10"-ish
-I'm still uncertain of my own sexuality
- " " of my own gender
Small journal entry tonight, I'm tired:
I'm a little nervous. This is the week I go to my first GLBT group. It's on Saturday in a city near me. I hope there are other teens just like me, and not a bunch of adults that I can't relate to. I wonder what I should wear, what I should say, what I should bring...
Ahh I can't contain myself! I'm excited! Wish me luck.
I've never really asked myself this question before. My parents tell me I'm antisocial all of the time, but I always ignore them. To explain, let me just say that the only friends I have are the ones in my neighborhood. I think it comes to only... 5 friends. Why is that?
Ever since I realized I was transgender, I have been trying to recount all of my old memories that may be linked to why I am who I am. When I was in elementary school, I would always hang out with my friends, like playing football, and doing normal things that a boy would do. I also remember hanging out with the girls sometimes, usually after I got teased by the other guys.
This is my first journal entry on this site, and I wanted to write about my doubts and fears. I feel that I was supposed to be born a girl, but I have so many thoughts and questions that cloud my mind, I don't know what to do. I've already told my parents about this, but they seem to be distant. To start my first thought, what if I were to live the rest of my life as a female?