So perhaps there is a Higher Power....
After getting a fortune cookie for lunch that says "THE TREASURES OF THE RAINBOW WILL SOON BE YOURS, " who can deny that the beyond is sending them messages?
I have concluded that someone with connections in heavenly places
A) is out to get me
B) works at a fortune cookie factory
-Feather
P.S. Fortune cookies are exceedingly tasty.

Today we had our Service Faire. If your schools don't have them, it is an opportunity for people from different organizations to come and talk to students about their community work. It gives us ideas as to what we want to do to raise our service hours. Some of the things that those people do are simply amazing, and I admire them. One speaker talked about their shelter for battered and abused women and their children. I was honored that they had such a high opinion of us highschool students to let us work there. After what some of those people have gone through, it is simply amazing that they have any spirit left.
Another man discussed his organization, which provides a home and tutoring by volunteers (juniors and seniors in our case) for children whose parents have left them, or have been declared unfit for custody. I am impressed by those who can manage to fit in these one-on-one sessions every week. It is a huge responsibility.
As for myself and my friend, we represented the AIDS Walk (exciting). I think many people were actually interested, and we got about 1/5 of our school to sign up to walk. Now, all we have to do is organize carpools. Any ideas?
After school, I had Theatre. This year we are doing an adaptation of 'A Midsummer Night's Dream". I am nervous, but happy, too. I love to act, even if I don't consider myself very good. My character, Theseus, has been introduced to the German accent. I'm not sure how it will work out, because right now, I'm just trying on different skins to see which brings out the traits best.
Our director is simply fantastic. I can't even describe it. Fabulous, perhaps.
On a more sobering note, I have a crazy math test tomorrow. Wish me luck. However, I have PE tomorrow! Call me crazy, but I love PE. And good-looking soccer players. One female one in particular...

Just a warning on the dangers of life in the proverbial closet. It was kinda funny today. (I know that my grammar is atrocious, but whatever) My cousin is getting married, and my aunt is hosting a wedding shower for her soon-to-be daughter-in-law. She wants a leopard print blanket! It was on her wedding registry. I thought, "Good Lord, I would never marry a woman with THAT on her wedding wish list." And then I almost said that to my parents. And THEN I was like, "Holy shiznits and the frickin' fracks, I cannot believe I almost said that to my DAD. He would FLIP." Heh heh. I don't know why I find that so depressingly hilarious.
Anyone else had similar incidents?
I am really hoping that a certain someone will come to LA AIDS Walk with me. *Crosses fingers and squeezes eyes*

Hi Peoples,
I just found this song on Youtube, and I really like its message. I thought I would share it. Here is the URL if the song doesn't embed:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJV9EMkv0u4

I hope this works...

By the way, I also thought that I would remind you how much I love you all. Have a great summer!

I haven't been back in awhile. Sorry, guys.
But I am excited and scared at the same time. I CAME OUT! To my friend. I am anxiously awaiting her response to my letter, since I was too cowardly to say it to her face, sadly.
More later. Homework calls, I'm afraid.

Well, today in Bio we did DNA fingerprinting. It is fascinating!
Ahhh, and I wrote a bit more. It doesn't rhyme or anything, but I rather like it.
*Deep Breath*
Here goes:

Once I thought I heard you call my name
Across the vast unendless sea of space
I wish that I could return the call
To bind your soul to mine and mine to yours
That our love would everlasting be
You live in another place
Another time
I see your features behind a pane of glass
Our hearts beat fit to break the ice
We are removed from the world, you and I
Yet we leave fingerprints on each other's soul.

Perhaps it is too... "Complaining-about-the-current-state-of-events" ? Hmm...

I donnnnn't thiiiink I have anything else to say at the present time.
Signing out! :^)

This is going to be short, but
Why must I always crush on the straight girls? The way of life I guess. It's just so incredibly frustrating, being at an all girls' Catholic highschool.
Sorry for being egotistical. Bye.

Hello Peeplz.
First I have to say that I am very sorry for not posting on Forums for a very long time.
There, now that that's out, I'll continue on to business.
Hmmm... perhaps it would be of interest that my crush has transferred into three of my seven classes? Yessss, Gollum, gollum. And that I sit next to her for one? Heh, heh, heh. You can bet that that was not an accident.
Well, at least Finals are over for last semester and I don't have to think about them for another few months. I think I did decently. Nothing spectacular, but I did manage not to completely bomb any tests. The Religion test really scared me. I hadn't erm... studied that thoroughly... and I thought that I might as well have signed my death sentence then and there. It went all right, though. I got almost full credit on short answer and essay questions, so that brought my grade up significantly.
And Winter Formal is coming up. I'm not going, due to an unfortunate scheduling skimizzle with the State Latin Tournament, but I like to imagine myself coming with a girl, and introducing her to the Sister and Head of School as my date, (problem: don't have a date). Dream on, Gigi. Still, it would be pretty funny to come in black leather pants (I have a secret adoration of black leather pants) and a empire waist top, wearing my coat and a dark fedora with a feather in it. I'm not sure what 'style' that would be labeled as, but it would be worth it to see the looks on everyone's faces.
It's strange, but I never truly noticed how much homophobia there is floating around until I started to identify as queer. (I feel a bit bad, as if I don't seem to notice much until it involves me. Urf, I hope that isn't true) Now don't take me wrong, I know plenty of people who are wonderful and accepting, but... I suppose you could compare it to a meal. It could be absolutely delicious, but say there is one dish is a bit less than tolerable. In a few years you may forget the delicious food, but you will remember the stuff that made you sick. I hope that makes sense.
Tomorrow I'm reciting the monologue from Romeo and Juliet in which Lord Capulet becomes furios with Juliet for refusing to wed Paris. I hope it goes well. For some reason I imagine Capulet as a portly, almost King Henry V -ish, old man. With a moustache, which he twirls in a leering manner on occasion.
Oh, and I almost forgot. Does anybody here watch The L Word? I am extreeeemely happy that it has started again. I admit, sometimes the plots are crazy, (Bette running off with Angelica?) but I do like it. Does anyone else sense a much-needed showdown between Papi and Shane?
Wow, that was pretty long. I hope everyone had a good week so far.

Well, it's my first poem, so I have to start somewhere right? (Even though it does sound awful.)

I know that this is silly
I know that you don’t care
Rather than hear me tell you how I feel
You’d prefer to be anywhere.

The truth is pretty stupid
No it’s not! I refuse to lie
I have to say what I have to say
I’d rather tell you now and die.

Than live a thousand years
Knowing I’d never said
The words that right here, right now,
Are spinning inside my head.

I have a small confession
No, I didn’t do anything wrong
Unless it’s a crime to love you
A crime to have felt this way so long.

There I’ve said it; it’s all out
The words still floating in the air
I wouldn’t take it back, even if I could
At least you know I care.

And you can hate me with all your heart
My feelings will always stay true
And if you ever need me
I’ll be waiting, always here for you.

Acck, *hack cough* gagggg. At least it rhymes to some degree.

Recently, I have been dying to tell someone about my sexuality, and just get it off my chest. (No offense, Oasis, I love you all.) I have formulated a 'plan' if you will, to see if I could possibly do this without being:
a.) Being murdered by family
b.) Being deserted/murdered by old friends
c.) Being murdered by strangers while at school
My plan consists of innocently asking my friends questions about how they feel about sexuality. If I determine that it is safe, I will drop hints here and there, and perhaps tell them soon after that.
Now, my family. Aargh, a thousand times more difficult because I live with them, and will for four more years. My brother has recently been picking up on my brainwaves, apparently, because he has been teasing me about how he thinks I am lesbian and so forth. (Not exactly uplifting.) I will probably listen discreetly at family gatherings, to see how they feel about homosexuality. I know my mom has a lesbian friend, and my dad has a gay co-worker, so they are not extremely homophobic. This stage of the plan has yet to be fully formulated, I guess. If my friends' reactions are positive, then I think I will have a better gauge of how my family will react.
Woah, that was scary. I'm typing with my bedroom door open (always a bad idea) and my dad just passed by. I thought he was going to come in and ask what I have been writing about. *Shiver*
Stage 1 went into effect today, as I wrote to two of my friends. I was writing a normal letter, and asked at the end of the first if she would still be my friend if I wasn't who she thought I was.
To the other, I had to tell a lie. I greatly dislike lying, but I don't think I could have done anything else. I told her that I had to ask someone these questions for biology class. (A bit of a stretch, but maybe she won't think too much about it.) The questions were something like:
1. Are you homophobic? (Blunt and to the point.)
2. How would you feel if you found out that someone (relative, friend) was gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender?
3. How would you alter your relationship with that person (if you would?)
Ok, my friend just came over, so I have to go.
Do you guys think that this is a good idea?
Thanks for letting me say these things.

I went snowboarding for the first time ever three days ago, and it is really really fun if you can survive the first day of extreme pain. The source of this pain is from falling on various areas of the butt and kness, or even worse, the same part of the butt and knees over and over again. I have a bruise the size of a grapefruit on my right knee. Otherwise, it was one of the best times I have ever had. My whole family went, but they all were on skis and I was the lone rebel (grin). And there were girrrrlls. Hoooottt girrrllls. I mean, to snowboard you have to be in reasonably good shape, right? So I was surrounded by drool-inducing females in snow clothes. I think I fell off my board a few times from merely looking at them. Of course, there was also the unavoidable incident of a fellow boarder running into me from behind. (Ouchles). I'd like to think that I improved to a low intermediate/intermediate snowboarder, however, because by the last day the low-inter. run from the top of the mountain was pretty easy-shmeazy. (Sorry if I'm bragging.) AND when I went with the rest of my family to turn in their skis, there was an especially good-looking female at the register. Ahhh, the difficulty of glancing at her out of the corner of the eye without alerting the parental units of any suspicious activity.
On one hand, I would rather eat live frogs then ever go back to school again, and then on the other, I can't wait because I'll see Alex and my friends. So confussing...
Sorry if this long rant made no sense whatsoever, or nearly bored you to tears, or made you scream with hyena-ish laughter at my quibbles.
I hope y'all had wonderful holidays!!!!!!

Welllllll, I went ice skating on Friday, and I had SO much fun. Not to mention that during school, my crush (who I will call Alex) came up to me and held my hands and gave me a hug and said that she couldn't wait to go. She was the one who invited me in the first place. (Perhaps I have a chance?) I couldn't concentrate for the rest of the day. I think my parents were worried at the way I kept pacing around and fussing with my clothes. I haven't told them about my sexuality yet.
My mother insisted on chaperoning me to the rink, which was a kind gesture, but utterly humiliating. She probably wanted to make sure that I wasn't meeting some 'nice' boy (ha!) that she should know about. Alex and her friends were just putting on their skates when I arrived.
The only disappointment was that I got to skate with her only once. Hey, at least it's more than nothing. But I did get to stand next to her for a few minutes while we stared at the newly arrived people who were invited, and then we joked around for a while afterwards. She skates very well, I must say.
I had to leave early, but my dad picked me up late (probably traffic), and so I got to say goodbye again. Hugs and all. Shall I just say that I was still flying on the ice?
I miss her so much. I keep hoping that she'll call me, or something. I guess it's silly to think that she would call me if I'm not prepared to call her. Now that school is out for the holidays, I probably won't see her until the time we come back. I suppose the question is (asked rather jokingly): can I survive that long?