I want to get on a boat and leave every single one of my friends behind.

They're not doing anything wrong; they're just not happy. I can't fix their problems, and I hate sitting around feeling like shit for not being able to.

I think everyone assumes I'm really close with other someone else in the group. I'm not. Every day I more disenchanted with these people.

The problem is, a lot of them think we're good friends. They'd never forgive me if I left, but I wouldn't feel that bad. Guilty? Definitely. But not really sad.

I want everyone else to be happy so I don't have to deal with their problems.

I am stronger now because I'm a monster. I don't know if I should tell them.