My friend, "Ali," has changed, and it's not good.
Ever since 4th grade, she's been my "BFF," my partner in whatever the opposite of crime is. We were goody-two-shoes together. The twin teacher's pets.
Flash forward to the present. Ali has sent me text messages with unfortunate double meanings to try to make me uncomfortable and started telling me about the creepy pervs in her class. She also thinks that putting a condom on a banana makes for a story funnier than the entire first season of Seinfeld. I always said that she would snap one day, and it seems she has.
However, I could have dealt with all that. I guess it's natural to go through phases and stuff. So I decided to come out to her anyway--she's always been a good friend and taken my side in arguments, etc.
But here's where it gets really bad: the very day I invite her over, planning to come out of the closet for the first time outside of my family, she starts cracking gay jokes. Ali, queen of apropriate behavior, champion of politeness!
(At this point I'd like to pause real quick and say WTF?! to life or karma or whatever it is that decided to screw me)
Naturally I was startled, but I decided that I would just wait for a bit and try again. So a few days ago i invited her over to hang out. She seemed pretty much normal again so I started to get my courage together and prepared to bare my soul to her. I was about to open my mouth when she interrupted me and said,
"Hey, I heard this great joke at school yesterday..."
I zoned out while I pretended to listen, keeping enough of my ear open to hear "five gay guys..."
"What's with all the gay jokes all of a sudden?" i cut her off without even thinking.
"What?"
"You keep telling all these gay jokes."
"Really?" She frowned, a little disgruntled at my lack of appreciation for her humor.
"Well, there was that one, and you keep saying the one about Justin Bieber..." I tried not to sound accusatory, but talking about it just made me more ticked off.
"But he's so gay I think he's a GIRL!" She cracked up and I bit my tongue. The next few hours were pretty strained, but i don't think she noticed.
Anyway, the point: I'm giving her one last chance, and then I'm really calling her on it. So basically I need some kind of comeback to snap her out of her gay-joke stupor. If you have any ideas, they would be much appreciated...I'm hoping I can show her how hurtful she's being before I have to give up and move on from our friendship. I love her a lot, but I'm not going to keep hanging out with someone who doesn't even realize how bigotted she's being.