Tonight was just like old times. It was one hell of a send off. First, the two families united for the memorial, hundreds of friends from chris' life showed up, and we all remembered him for all the good times.

Then, after a not-so-moving service by a convert-or-burn christian priest, who didn't even know Chris, we all headed over to the bar.

Shots, beers, food, and hours of chatter later, it was good to meet up w/ all my old friends, and even some enemies, from high school, drink to our lost buddy, and make up w/ some people I had left at odds with. Including my ex. She was there.

But it's all good. RIP Chris, you will be missed. Your ability to make everyone laugh, always be off the wall, and encourage others to do something crazy will always be a part of us.

Also, It was good to meet up w/ matt tonight. His sister, was an aquaintance of mine in school, and when we were in our junior year, she hung herself, due to peer pressure from being gay. She hatted it, and hated herself.

Matt bought me a shot, and he and some friends and I drank to old homies, and good times. He also talked about his sister, who he found hanging in their apartment. he has never gotten over that.

Tonight, he said to me, even though we rarely talk, even though we never see each other, we are still friends...for life. and that was good to hear.

I seriously feel that I need to do something like open up a teen center for the youth here in our small part of the evergreen state. we have the highest death and suicide rate, all things included, in the state for ages 16-22, and I feel like so much of the problem stems from substance abuse, lack of resources, and especially bullying.

I think like my friend Skai said, we need to open up a teen center kind of spot, and find some way to reach these kids. too many friends have died, and I know I was lucky to have not been among them.

Hope you all have a good night.

hell.