A short journal will have to do for tonight.

First of all I love Ron Paul.
Because I don't understand how any Republicans can justify their positions. The Republican beliefs have, to me, 2 directly contradicting major items in them.
First, most Republicans are against big government, they don't like large amounts of taxes, they don't want federal government intruding in their general, daily lives. They want most powers of legislation to reside at the state level, and they want few regulations on what they can do, considering those to be a family or community matter, not of concern to anyone else.
Which I can totally respect, even if a I disagree with a few small respects here and there.
But they also don't like abortions, gays, prostitution, polygamists, drug users, any plethora of things you can imagine, they don't like them and want to legislate against them to try to make them go away.
And, I swear, I've looked in the official Republican Party Platform, it holds 2 directly contradicting statements, here paraphrased: 1. They support the Defense of Marriage Act, which is a bill that legislates that gay marriage approved in one state is not legal in the next. The platform says that it totally supports states being able to uphold their own gay-marriage laws, and then 2. They also support a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage, just a few fucking lines later.
Like, fuck, I don't know how they survive and live with that.
The Defense of Marriage Act and a possible constitutional amendment banning gay marriage are 2 things that they use lofty reasoning to justify, but in reality both are just fucking homophobia, and also directly contradicting.

The Republican ideal philosophy is one that I like and can respect and even believe in parts of. But in practice most of the people who follow it are just fucking bigoted assholes.
That's why I fucking love Ron Paul cause he can actually get over himself and support the party philosophy like it would be ideally to a non-cockulous person, even though a large amount of people vilify him for it.
Well, hopefully someday they'll figure it out.

Then, also, my swim coach has told me to stop posting various things on Facebook, some of which I can kinda understand (She doesn't want me saying fuck or shit or anything, because there's little kids from the swim team that are my fb friends. And while I have philosophical reasons for not fucking minding profanity, I understand it's part of the culture we live in, and all culture is just arbitrary irrationality, so whatever, I have to deal with not being able to swear in a place little kids can see it)
And there are some things I would never post on facebook, such as saying like "Playing Guitar Hero, then piano, then dancing my fucking ass off while drunk= SO MUCH FUCKING FUN", which I have no reason to post, I mean, I have a feeling somehow you can get into trouble for doing that...
Anyway, she doesn't like me posting about controversial issues, such as religion or politics. And I disagree with that, and I don't understand it.
For one, I don't usually bother to actually refute things, most of my comments are strictly satire, like (courtesy of our friend Matthew) I posted a photo of the New Canaan Baptist Church sign that said "A free thinker is Satan's slave!". I didn't even say anything...
Although I also did like a page called "Fuck God, believe in yourself", which is maybe more understandable.
But I still disagree.
Because I fucking love 1984, fantastic book, and I think we learn several lessons from it, among the most important of which I think is: To avoid an intolerant, oppressing, monolithic government that oppresses free thought, there are 2 things I think we must do:
1. Be loud, proud, and up front about our ideas and beliefs
2. Have the ability to separate ourselves from what we were indoctrinated with in childhood and form out own views
These 2 are both necessary, and both must be present to a certain extent to avoid oppression
as interpreted by me.
Now, the New Canaan Baptist Church is definitely being loud and proud which I usually respect no matter what, but it's directly fighting rule 2, so I hate them now.
And so, I just think that most of my friends, the vast majority of people I know are Christians, most of them, of one sort or another. I know a few that are Mormons.
I'm extremely critical of both Christianity and Mormonism and I disagree with many of their central tenets. But I still respect my friends just as much and I don't care.
Like Mitt Romney, he's a Mormon, whatever, I disagree, but he seems to me to be by far the most reasonable candidate the Republicans might actually elect, (not Ron Paul) and I think he's largely the most qualified Republican, so if I was a Republican, of voting age, and Ron Paul didn't exist, I'd vote for Mitt Romney, as uninspiring as he is.
And on of my best friend's fb pages show that he's a Christian, "extremely conservative", and he loves Herman Cain.
Those are 3 things I'm stratospherically critical of. But I respect him being out and proud about it and having his own ideas (for the most part, I tend to believe that most religion and conservatism of any kind is generally a result of childhood indoctrination, such as these magazines I received today from some Jehovah's Witnesses (hehe...) where someone was talking about how their 15 month old baby was pointing out Bible characters and learning how to say their names, the 30 or so he's learned being about half of his vocabulary. I don't think that's exactly his thoughts he's spewing out amidst his baby babble...)
and he's a smart, good guy, so I don't give a shit what his views are, though I tend to get into mild debates with him at parties and sleepovers at his house...
And I think that's a good thing that he disagrees with me, cause if the whole world agreed with me, well I'm definitely wrong on something, so the only safe way for the world to be is for everyone to have their own opinions and just hope like fuck that the smart people outweigh the assholes, cause, let's face it, we're definitely a misinformed asshole on some issues. I mean, I tend to think I'm right on most issues, but that's just me...
Although things like gay marriage and the war on drugs, I don't think that's good that they disagree with me, I think those are pretty objectively stupid...
But anyway.

I think it's important that I, as the most persecuted today of all religious minorities (Atheist), be loud and proud about that fact (according to The God Delusion, people would vote for an otherwise qualified candidate who was say, a woman, 95% of the time, even a homosexual was in the 70's, and Muslims were there in with them, but Atheists are down at 49%, less than fucking half)
Because there's no reason that I have to be any less open about my religious beliefs or lack thereof than my friends, simply because they're in the majority. (By the way, someone I don't know that well but now hate had this picture where it said "here's to the people who stand for Christ, no matter what people think", and that fucking pissed me off, I was like "oh noes, you poor persecuted white christian minority of the United States, how do you get over how much people hate on you? Or was it the other way around?")
So it wouldn't offend me to find out someone was a Christian or Mormon or Muslim or Jew or Rastafarian or Hindu or fucking Papau New Guinea cannibal pagan, why should it matter if I post on fb about being an atheist? Why should that offend anyone that I disagree with them? I disagree with most everyone on something, except maybe Penn, I agree with him on mostly everything...

Anyway, after that ramble that was way too fucking long and took up way too motherfucking much of my time, and probably yours as well, I would like to update you on gay prospects for yours truly here:
Jun, the little Asian who randomly chatted me in the lunchroom, hasn't mentioned anything again, I'm willing to write it off to just a friendly conversation, although I'm still skeptical, and will be watching in case he does anything else suspicious...
Uh, there's a guy in German that I used to sit next to but don't anymore named Chas, only one letter off my name, it's so fucking confusing cause whenever I heard Cha-, I immediately assume it's me, so I have a bunch of starts in German... Anyway, I'm 99.9% sure he wants to fuck right now. And that's a possibility, actually, I mean, I wouldn't date the kid, he's weird, but fucking maybe (uh, he forced me to stroke his eyebrows today...)... I mean, if it was anyone else, I'd go in a heartbeat, but this kid weirds me out for so many reasons, he's just kinda creepy and maybe gross in general. But altogether quite cute, so we'll see...
And there's this new guy that has now joined my friends circle that I've heard is queer, and he doesn't seem to do anything to dispel that rumor... If I can just get myself to fucking ask, maybe I'll know then. Anyway, this guy is perhaps less cute than Chas, his name's Austin, but he's pretty motherfucking awesome, so that's definitely a plus... I hope some point this week I can finally ask him and not freak out about it like a little bitch, although I've been seeming to do that more and more recently, having weird dreams that make me unbearably nervous even though I don't know why...

FUCK THIS SITE SUCKS UP WAY TOO MUCH OF MY FUCKING TIME I SPENT FAR TOO FUCKING LONG, DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW MUCH HOMEWORK I HAVE TONIGHT I'M NOT GETTING TO SLEEP BEFORE MIDNIGHT I SWEAR AND IT'S ONLY THURSDAY TOMORROW...
I'll have to get to that... Jesus, life just seems like such less of a joy than it used to be...
G'night Oasies