YOU FUCKING GUYS I FEEL SO GOOD RIGHT NOW I CAN'T EVEN. I AM NOT AT ALL LIKE I WAS FOR THE PAST WEEK OR SO. I AM LIKE A NEW FUCKING SUPER DUCK OR SOMETHING. I DON'T EVEN KNOW, MAN. In fact I can't even begin to tell you what I'm like right now, so here's a .gif I found on Tumblr:
Now the reason I am like that is probably pretty lame-sounding, but I've been so terrible lately that everything good is automatically amazing. BUT I AM LIKE SO GOOD RIGHT NOW HOLY SHIT anyway so let me explain!
So, once upon a time, there was a Lame Super Duck. Lame Super Duck was just doing her summer homework and cleaning her closet, minding her own business, you know? Well, she felt like SHIT! So she thought about things that would make her feel better if she did them. "Burn school" and "TP Mrs. History Teacher's house" were not plausible, so she went with the third best option. Text FCG!
Now, FCGs tend to break their phones every other day and lose all their numbers. This is okay, though, because Super Ducks can always just say, "Hey, I'm a Super Duck!" if the FCG asks. This is what happened when Lame Super Duck texted FCG. But Lame Super Duck was not prepared for FCG's response...
"I love you Super Duck!! I'm sorry, I'm always breaking my phone!"
What? LAME SUPER DUCK is evolving! ... Congratulations! LAME SUPER DUCK evolved into KICK-ASS SUPER DUCK!
That quite clearly says, "I love you Super Duck," and it's from FCG, so... YES I LOVE EVERYTHING
Kick-Ass Super Duck knows the FCG probably meant it in just a friends way, but she is still excited nonetheless. She was very quick to tell the FCG that she loves her too and then save the message foreverrrr. Now, she is writing this and taking breaks to dance while drinking a giant soda (YAY A SUGAR RUSH YAY YAY YAYYYY!) and waiting for more FCG replies because this is the longest text conversation she has ever had with the FCG, lasting over an hour.
Not even Mrs. History Teacher can stop Kick-Ass Super Duck!
Anyway, yeah, this was the most weirdly-written post ever... BLAME THE SODA!