A lot of people have used the word "love" rather loosely. Wouldn't you agree? I mean, "I love nachos" sounds far too similar to "I love my husband/wife" for me to take it seriously.
I remember i was sitting in a Veterans of Foreign War's bar (my father is a Vietnam Veteran, giving me access to such places) and there was a man my father has come to know from his time spent in said bar.
We'll call him Jamer.
Now Jamer was a WWII veteran, and i was told he was quite the man to be respected. He had the face of strong leather knowledge. More lines on his left cheek alone than any road map you'd fine on the east side of the great Mississip'.
His eyes were grey, icy, solid remnants of what i have come to be told were once enthusiastic and bright with the optimism and eagerness to please and prove himself that can be found in those driven youth hardly common today.
If his hardened exterior didn't earn your opinion of this man to waver towards extraordinary, his voice did. Such thunder, such hollow prominent bass in the raspy man's tone you could hear your glass rattle on the bar top when he spoke of that which sparked his emotion!
And his voice was used well, he explained to me what i consider myself to be very proud to know now. Immediately after he told me, i wrote it all down, and once i got home, i read it over and over again until i was sure that the essence...the life of his words sank into my skin. Sank into my bones. Into my memory for all my life.
He told me that love is real. It truly is. But what people don't realize is that we each can only be happy when we have TWO loves in life.
Our lover. A trusted companion not only thought of as a boyfriend or girlfriend, husband or wife, but also as the first person you come to for every single situation. Every person in life will find trouble, it has always been this way, and it always will. But what makes someone a lover is being that person that they will come to with all problems.
"No hands may be shaken so long as fists are clenched." the man said.
A lover is your best friend. Your companion. Your mentor. Your most prized part of yourself and the part of your life that you show off with pride.
And love itself? Well, to be put simply, you see no fault in someone. You may see things that others see as fault, but to you they are not fault. These blemishes in the person's character, appearance, or behavior are seen as what's wrong with your lover. But to you? Why, you love these parts of him/her just as much as every other quality of that person. because that's exactly what they are, qualities.
Qualities that make this person into the person they are. The one you love. There is nothing wrong with who you love. They have no faults. Only qualities that make the more beautiful. That's what it is to love someone.
The second love of life is life itself. And loving life is built on the same principals of loving your partner.
You accept life's pros and cons, and accept them not as faults and advantages, but as qualities of life that make it original and interesting. Embrace it and it shall hold you as tightly as any lover.
The only way to have what is called "true love". The sacred love that is shared between two people whom will always be together. From the moment they began loving until their ability to love goes out, and some believe not even then.
True love is simple. As are most the more magnificent things in life.
To have honest, sure enough, no doubt about it, unbroken, unflenching, unquestionable true love.
You must care for one of the two loves more than the other.
To love someone, truly love someone, you must be willingly to give your life to that person. Wrap your heart and soul in a box and give it to them as a gift and a testament to how much you completely and utterly trust them with every part of you. The good of you, and the bad of you that they don't, and won't ever see as fault.
That's true love.
I thank Jamer for giving me this piece of wisdom.
Jamer has been happily married for sixty three years next month.
I'm not religious.
Never have been.
But if god should bless anyone, it should be someone with as much to give as ol' Jamer and his wife.