
I don't know what I'm going to do for titles once my computer starts working again, I really don't. But it failed again last night :(
So basically I'm not feeling anything. It's... weird. Because I'm not happy, but I'm not feeling anything unpleasant either. And I'm finding it kind of hard to care about anything.
I'm still acting fairly normal. Well, normal for me, anyway. But it doesn't feel like I'm being that way because it's how I am. I feel as if I'm in character. I know who Flyby is, and I'm doing that, but it's like I'm pretending. It feels exactly the same as when I've done plays or skits, or written 1st person POV stories, or roleplays, or stuff like that.
Not real.
I do have a tendency to get really stuck in character whenever I do things like those, though. I would be the best method actor, because I've sometimes written 1st person stories, fallen asleep, and still been thinking as that character in the morning.
Which just makes it easier, I guess. Because nothing really seems to be wrong. It's just not right, either. I wonder when I'll wake up, in a ways. Will I suddenly realise, 'HEY, I feel like Flyby again!' Or will it be gradual, and then I'll feel all upset and occasionally happy and such again, and life will be relatively normal, and I can get back to eating my bagels?
Speaking of which, neither the school cafeteria nor the restuarant that sold them originally carries my favorite kind of bagels anymore, and I used to eat those for lunch Every. Single. Day. So basically I'm not eating lunch anymore, except for when I feel like it, because I'm in the habit of getting those bagels and don't feel motivated enough to form a new habit for lunch. I'm not really hungry, anyway.
Random interlude, much?
But yeah. And I am staying! I shall stay! The computer shan't thwart me!
Comments
Hmm,
this has happened to me as well. I "get" what you're saying. I'm glad you're deciding to stay here even though technological difficulties keep you from updating as often as you would like.
:-D