Dear Invalidating Person,

You don't know how much you hurt me when you cut me out of your life completely. Stopped talking to me in person, stopped seeing me in person, stopped talking with me on the phone, stopped talking to me online.

I feel invisible to her. I want just to fucking talk to her. Give her a hug.

I want to have her back in my life. I want to matter.

I wish I wasn't so easy to close, as if a book, and be put on the shelf. People leave me so often...I guess I don't give them what they want in a friendship. I'm a fucking asshole, I know it.

The worst thing is knowing that we were best friends for like 11 years. And that the year before she stopped all contact with me, we told each other everything. She was the first to know about me binding.

And then there was the day that I tried talking to her online because it had been months (at that point) since we had spoken, and she replied with "Just fuck off." I felt like shit. I still do, just thinking about it.

I'm so fucking sick of missing her. I want to see her. Or at least not feel the pain of emptiness from her not being there.

The last time we spoke was in September 2009 or so. Its been so fucking long.

Depressed as fuck. Again.

Love,
That "friend" you abandoned