So I got the courage today to tell my Best-Friend I was Gay. She was actually very proud of me, for telling her that being so brave, and she said she still loved me and that it doesn't change anything about our friendship. So my day got better. It was also the start of the new Semester and I can already tell that I like my classes much more, new kids, some of which are people who are my friends :D. But anyways I thought I'd tell everyone my best-friend now knows my WONDERFUL secret.
When I told her my heart was pounding so hard, and my face felt warm. The words resonated throughout my head and I felt weird. Not relieved but weird, but after a few minutes I felt good, and everything became bright. I now laugh, smile, and grin now that I think of it. It makes me happy and warm. I know corny.
I say Wonderful because it's not longer this horrible thing, it's something that I've accepted and that I'm proud of. It's a rebirth, a new beginning, a sort of Self-Renaissance. Being LGBT isn't an ending it's the beginning of a really good book. I can now talk to my best friend about guys, ask for dating advice, and asking her to double check my gaydar when I have my doubts haha. But in general I know it'll be hard actually coming out completely and I will loose some friends and unfortunately make some enemies, but in my eyes it's worth being myself then hiding my true self. But I still have time to decide that. Anyways thought I'd let you guys know, and that I love you all!!!