It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time

7 January, 2011 - 6:37pm — graph.paper

People saw me. I was tipsy. I wanted to do it and I used my tipsiness to make it okay.

When you're largely still in the closet, the smallest things, the smallest means of flirtation, are a big deal. I didn't know people were watching, or that she told my friend.

But I wanted nothing more than that. But she saw it as taking advantage of me. But I wanted something to happen. But it didn't, and never will.

I'm amazed that it was taken as "hitting on" her. Because I am SO BAD at that. At least I did it right. And apparently she took it as a bigger deal than she showed.

Glad to learn all of this through text message.

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Comments

8 January, 2011 - 5:18am — loreonpravus

Ugh, disappointing texts. I

Ugh, disappointing texts. I hate getting a text that just kind of shoots through you and makes your heart fall into your stomach and splash your innards.

People do incredibly idiotic things when they're drunk. If you bring up "alcohol and how damn stupid people are when drunk" I highly doubt the whole thing won't be attributed to your intoxication. From personal experience, drunken happenings usually blow over and forgiven in time.

Just be casual about the whole thing- give off the "I don't care that I did that cause it was the alcohol anyways" vibe to speed that along. People mirror other people, so if you're not ready to come out, just play it cool and stuff will end up settling down.