Welp, I woke up this morning expecting a bright sunshiny day full of smiles and friends... but what did I get... rain. rain. and soggy converse. *Note to self: invest in a pair of rubber boots. So I had to swim across campus basically. Classes were okay, if you count the fact that I actually stayed awake. I really need to practice better sleeping habits. Dang, I keep getting off topic...I was supposed to be going somewhere with this :] Basically, things have been really tense at home for the past couple weeks and I can't tell if it's because I'm now in college or the fact that my mom has a smidgen suspicion that I'm a lesbian. I mean it's not like I've really tried to hide it (keeping seasons of the L Word under my bed doesn't count as hiding, right?) I've bought books online, and left them on my bed and everything.

The tension basically started after my mom found out that Melissa Etheridge was gay (she already knew I listened to her). She never confronted me about it; my sister told me. My sister's my secret spy in all things parental lesbian cognition. My sister said my mom basically started ranting about how gay people go to hell, and then she shuddered in a digusted kinda way. So I totally didn't expect this kind of reaction to it at all. (my mom loves ellen and doesn't see anything wrong with her sexuality) I guess it's the fact that it's her daughter that throws her for a loop. Also, now when I talk about a guy friend I talked to, she doesn't automatically start in on the teasing (oooo.. you like him) raucous I had become to loath with a passion. So now I'm kinda confused. And you must be thinking... "why should all this be a problem? you don't have to tell your mom everything." and truthfully, you're right. The problem is I've always been really close to my mom, and I'm basically her best friend. That makes everything that much harder on both her and me. But one good thing has come out of this tension: I've been able to focus more on friends than homelife, and now I've made lots of new friends at college, and they accept me for who I am! =D I guess the point of my mindless rambling, is that I'm happy for the most part, but does anyone think my college life would be smoother if I went ahead and told my parents before they find out from someone else, or I actually get a girlfriend in the near future (I can only hope)? I'm open to any suggestions and/or comments about my situation...THX! :D