Just got back from town. No I am not sleepin with anyone. Why did I get Skylar's number. He kissed me. Once, twice. I don't know he wanted me to stay I fucked that up. Fuck that he's all madeup. Whatever, my heart is somewher else. Somewhere not here, if I can find it.

That boy is so cute. Not Skylar. So unbelievably cute. I clubbed with him and our best friend. Met him hung with him for the second time. He doesn't do random hookups. In fact, I don't even know if he's into me. It makes me feel so out of control. He'd hold my hand and take me to the dance floor, but he hates getting with people he doesn't know well. He's so.... detached. He's not THAT hot... but he just seems more unattainable... and I want to conquer that. Damn.

I keep getting hit on by randoms. I saw so many people I hooked up with when I went gay clubbing again and realised maybe I should stop. But then I also want to meet more people, get with more people. I got ugly guys hit on me tonight... I don't even know what that means. Whatever. They were not very nice after I rejected them. I danced with B and pretended she was my girlfriend. Then I danced with said cute-boy and said he's my boyfriend. Then they said you guys are a bad combination. YEAH I BET YOU DID'N'T THINK THAT WHEN YOU GROPED MY ASS MOTHERFUCKER. Okay I don't know I'm being conceited. Sometimes I really don't know if I'm good enough... I usually get with someone everytime I go gay clubbing... but this said cute-boy who is so chaste just has my mind right now. Fuck. Whatever. Maybe I need plastic surgery. What, he's a fucking catholic. Fucking faggots can't be catholic. No.

And my alarm if beeping again. It always goes off at 4am... everytime right after I get home. It's getting so creepy. I need to get with someone. I haven't since last week.. and I didn't really care but everytime I get with someone I get out of control. Why. Fuck that shit.

I have a new lesbian best friend. She is HOT. She wants me to meet her girlfriend and hang with her group. Maybe I should have a 'gay' group after all.

Time for beauty sleep... love you all! Everyone is gay as Christmas! Except B the Christian says Christmas is not gay... but she loves gay people... okay okay okay quote "I realised not all gay people are bad! I love you!" Yeah HAHAHAHA.

Night