today, after school, i asked some of my friends about their gaydars...
they held out their arms and proceeded to beep...when they pointed at
me, they beeped like...beebeebeebeebeebeebeebeebeebeebeep
there wasn't anytime to pronounce the "p"...haha
and so when blue shows up we go hai thar! and here's the convo...
h: so what's your orientation?
B: huh? what?
t,h, and me: you're sexual orientation
B: oh, um...i dont know...um...what?
h: you know, like bi curious? quesitoning?
B: i-i dunno...
h: you dont know?
B: yeah, i dont know
-end-

so, my friend beat me to the punch...
but hey! i have a slight chance...
anywho...before THAT happened...
brunch~ i was tired she was tired, she was sitting i was standing,
i go and hug her and just hold on to her for a bit, she hugs me too, and,
get this, she doesn't let go either, now, normally, people would drop
their arms after a couple seconds...she didin't...either i'm reading too
much into things or...i always read too much into things...
anywho...yeah...(yes, i realize i told you, this is with more detail)
then...there was yesterday...when we went to the library...and on the
way home i put my sunglasses on even if it was already getting dark and
played blind...she led me to her home and when we got to her door
i still had my eyes closed and wondering where she went and her hand
pops out of nowhere...her hands were freezing my hands were burning
perfect huh? i tell her that her hands are freezing and she says my
hands are really warm(pointing out the obvious, look how smart we are!)
and she says that it feels good...my warms hands that is...i was...
blissful...that we were holding hands...

my problem: i want to tell her i like her but i dont want to...
the "dont do it" side is winning...and one of my friends says i'll know
when it's the right time to tell her but....there are the "what if"s and
stuff and...guh...eAe i tire myself out...gawd... the urge to...be more
affectionate with her is getting stronger...but i dont want to ruin this
amazing friendship that we have...someone halp...TTATT