The last two days have gotten better, still iffy, but better to say the least. I found this new artist that I LOVE, Sondre Lerche. He is such a good musician. If you like Indie/ light rock kind of stuff, check him out.
My mom is talking to me, so that's nice. I still don't communicate with her boyfriend much. You know that saying, "you can't do one with the other", well I can't try to hold a conversation with him if he doesn't put in the effort either. My mom just doesn't understand that. She said that I'm not responsible enough to drive yet..... responsible. I'm on a varsity level team, I'm a Maryland Scholar Athlete, I'm in the NHS, I do my chores, help my younger brother do his, I do my school work, help out my younger brother with his, AND I have a job. Please define responsible? I actually asked her how I was irresponsible and she couldn't even answer, so she changed her reason of not letting me drive to, "you need to earn it. Work on you family relationships and I'll think about it." I have an AMAZING relationship with my brothers, birth dad, my mom (kind of), and Jason's not family so I don't need one with him. She said that I HAVE to build some kind of relationship with him or I'll never drive. So basically, I'm going to be attempting to talk to a guy who won't talk to me for a week. I'm going to be "building a relationship" with a wall. Oh not only that, but every week she's going to "reevaluate" me too see if I have earned it yet. She wanted to reevaluate every month, but that's way too long yo. So I asked her if she could do it every week; she agreed, thank (imaginary) god.
My Aunt actually texted me and asked how I was doing, I lied and said I was doing well. I have a feeling my mom doesn't want me expressing my feelings to anyone anymore. So I guess this is my last option huh?
My Dad came into town the other day and stayed the night. Dude, I love him so much. He makes me so much happier. He is almost never down and he is so funny. You cannot not laugh when your around him. He said I'm welcome at his apartment anytime, but I'm pretty sure I'm staying on the island. My mom stopped telling me to go, all my friends are pretty much saying I'm retarded for even thinking about leaving, and I guess their right. I'm going into my Junior year, transferring now would just be stupid. Especially since I'd probably want to transfer back for my Senior year. I'll just have to tough it out two more years, then I'm off too Cali.
Oh by the way, my dad and I are planning a road trip starting in San Diego and just driving North to look at all the colleges that I'm interested at. He is sooooo fucking cool.
I was so inspired to write a song last night, but I didn't. I kind of regret it now, it was sounding pretty good in my head too. I went to a beach on KI that I had never been to too help one of my really good friends burn her diaries that she's had since she was really little. It was like her way of moving on and forgetting the past. It was so symbolic in her life and I was so happy/proud of her. She even started crying =[ it was a good kind of tears though.
I'm procrastinating my summer reading for AP World, not a good idea. This book is pretty much the death of me. It's so long and agonizing, plus the questions we have to answer and the 500 word paper due the day we arrive at school. Awesome!
I was talking to one of my friends who live out in CA with M. I guess their trying to go to the aquarium and take shrooms at the same time. I never really thought that M would get into heavy drugs.... I kind of feel bad about her doing them too. I think it's because I still care if she fucks up her life or not, even though I shouldn't. She says she doesn't have an addictive personality, I guess the shrooms will be her test of that. Good luck yo.