Introduction

11 March, 2009 - 4:54am — queercatholic

Hi folks,

So tonight I decided to search on google for youth-oriented sites that contain GLBT info and THIS PLACE is what I found?!?! WOAH COOL!!!!!!! I would like to thank whomever started this site (Jeff? Sorry, I have to go back n double check the post where someone mentioned the creator's name...) Allow me to introduce myself. I am 17 years old and I hail from an extremely homophobic place where I am mostly unaccepted for who I am (by the VERY few people that know I'm a bisexual...yep, they'd effin have a heart attack if they knew I was uhm...a LESBIAN!) and other days they are just in denial about it and think I'm going through a phase. These people mainly include my family and a few close family friends. I have a few people in my church community whom I am friends with who are aware of my sexuality but they "don't support" homosexuality, however, they love me anyway.

I have recently been coming to the conclusion that I might be a lesbian after one of said friends brought up the point that they think I'm gay. I got to thinking and examining myself and I think they might be right. I NEVER fanticize about guys-EVER and I'm NOT turned on by them or by images of them with very lil clothing on (even the ones who I find are hott, as in their facial features are attractive) I think penises are disgusting. Plain and simple. I could not care less about guy's abs or asses either. On the flip side, all of my sexual fantacies involve women, having sex with them, touching them etc. I check women out all the time too. I found myself today looking forward to seeing a presentation at my school done by a dance commitee because I knew the ladies would be shakin' their thangs. Am I a lesbian, or what? You be the judge. I still have a few grains of doubt, however regarding my sexuality. I do find some guys to be good-looking-hot even. However, I NEVER find myself having sexual fantacies about them. What are your guy's experiences with this? Can a lesbian STILL find men to be attractive (in a non-sexual way) too?

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Comments

11 March, 2009 - 5:09am — Lehcure

Hi, I love you

Hi, I love you :)
hehh..anyways ...
I happen to be a lesbian, and I think some men are handsome. Either good bone structures or good complexions or cool eyes. We're all people, and just admiring human physical characteristics in a non-sexual way is normal for me anyways.

11 March, 2009 - 5:21am — wilde_sapphire

Hey Welcome!

I consider myself lesbian most of the time and I still find many men very attractive and have had a few fantasies but I think that's all just human attraction. What makes an orientation is who you really want to be with in reality and who you feel most connected with.

Do you really think it is weakness that yields to temptation? I tell you that there are terrible temptations which it requires strength, strength and courage to yield to.

11 March, 2009 - 5:27am — Riku

Well...

My sexuality is kind of, confusing. Because I used to identify as gay (and female) before I came out as male...

And now I'm gay again. |D

I mean, I think some girls are flippin' gorgeous, but not "sexy" you know? I think I had a minor aversion to guys as a "girl" due to being woefully insecure, so I think that confused me. Because I liked the whole gay scene, I identified with it, but not as a lesbian, but I was a "girl" so I called myself gay and assumed that I liked girls. But I couldn't get why I envied gay guys. |D (Denial is fun like that.)

ANYWAYS. Instead of going over the story of my life, I'll stop there.

Welcome to Oasis and all. :D Sorry if my being prone to going on tangents scared you.

11 March, 2009 - 5:27am — fox333

hi welcome again! (i

hi welcome again! (i welcomed you on your other post too, i just saw hi, and couldn't resist saying hi back!) :D i know... im lame.... but who cares?! *hug*

11 March, 2009 - 5:30am — queercatholic

you go on tangets too?

Well then, I think we will get along GREAT then, Riku ;-) I have a lot of questions about transgenderism too, so I'm glad to see there are some transgenders on here, as well!

11 March, 2009 - 5:53am — Riku

You've got questions, I've got answers

Or at least, I probably do.

Tangents are the spice of life...

11 March, 2009 - 5:30am — hellonwheels

hey...welcome to oasis

i happen to be a gay guy whos sometimes attracted to and or finds himself checking out women, but i wont judge you on ur first post, tho it is quite possible you are a lezzie.

Mental wounds not healing, driving me insane, i'm goin' off the rails on a crazy train- the ozzman

11 March, 2009 - 5:32am — queercatholic

who I "feel most connected with"...

SEE THATS ANOTHER confusing thing for me! I find it's easier for me to talk to guys and make friends with them but I'm not SEXUALLY attracted to them, yah know? Please tell me I'm making sense!!!! GAHHHHHH CONFUSION MAJOOOOR CONFUSION!!!!!!!!

11 March, 2009 - 5:43am — hellonwheels

ur aming perfect sense...

dont you jsut hate how confusing it can be @ times?

Mental wounds not healing, driving me insane, i'm goin' off the rails on a crazy train- the ozzman

11 March, 2009 - 5:32am — Doctor Beastly

Attraction of Life

There is nothing wrong with thinking that the boy is cute, good lookin', or whatever you like to say. A thought is only a thought if you want it to be. What matters is what you want to feel. Just because your eyes pause a sec when the hot one passes by does not mean you are no different from who you feel to be.
I have at times pass by a girl and thought she was beautiful, but I have no spark of interest. Then again, the old coal has not lite for years. Thankfully the motor still runs on.

11 March, 2009 - 5:45am — bulldyke

i'm with lehcure. i'm 100%

i'm with lehcure. i'm 100% a lesbian (and fully appriciative of how lucky i am to be so certain), and i still can see how men are attractive. i never want to have sex with one, but that doesn't mean that i can't see how they are attractive. they don't turn me on....i have women for that :P.

oasis is a really cool place, and you'll find a lot of loving people here who will accept you and love you whoever you are.

as to how you define yourself and what words you use....it's not up to us, or anyone else. it's all about you. and really...the word doesn't matter so much. if you like girls, you like girls. if you like guys, you like guys. maybe you're gay, or bi, or whatever. sexuality is a spectrum....it's possible that, if the RIGHT guy came along you'd fall for him and it's possible that you'll never be interested in them.

what's important is to just be yourself, and not worry too much about what you call yourself.

and ANYTIME you have questions about life, or being gay/bi/whatever, or anything at all, post them, or message me (if you want). we're all here to help. :D

Bulldyke
"As my mother always said, there's nothing that says 'stay out of my airspace' quite like a couple of F-18s." ~Rachel Maddow

11 March, 2009 - 5:53am — Merric

I'm a lesbian Catholic

I'm a lesbian Catholic too... glad to know there are others that exist out there.
Did you know Gregory Maguire (author of Wicked) is a gay Catholic?

Also... some guys can be pretty, but me+them=no.

11 March, 2009 - 6:42am — jeff

Hmm...

Yup, I created the site.

Hmm, I hope you're a lesbian, it's in your username now. :-)

Of course, if you need that changed down the line to bisexualatheist, unlabeledwiccan or whatever, just let me know. I can change usernames.

But if lesbiancatholic works long term, that's cool, too.

Glad you found us, stick around for a while.

---
"People who are happy are slugs... They do not move the human race forward."
-- Camille Paglia, on Oasis

11 March, 2009 - 6:57am — patnelsonchilds (not verified)

Since Jeff was silly enough

Since Jeff was silly enough to announce publicly that he can change usernames, all such requests should be sent to him. :P

Welcome once again, LC.

_________________________________

- Pat Nelson Childs
"bringing strong gay & lesbian characters to Sci-Fi & Fantasy"

12 March, 2009 - 2:14am — jeff

Oh, I'm sorry...

Did I take one of your favorite jobs away? :-)