i can't seem to do anything right these days.

i'm so bad with people. and i know you all don't believe that, but i am.

i know how to give, but i'm so bad at taking.

and whenever i try to be good, and take care of myself, i ALWAYS wind up hurting others.

i feel horrible right now. i don't want to talk about it, i just want it to be better.

i feel so lonely, and sometimes, it's better to be alone when i'm like this.

cause i don't want to hurt the people around me.

and the only comfort i have, at least sometimes, is that they care.

i just...i CAN'T let people help me. not all the time. i just can't. call it a flaw, call it stupid, whatever you like.

i don't mean to hurt you, i don't. i just don't know what else to do.

and now i'm so tired my eyeballs are falling out, nad my head hurts, and i just want to curl up under my blankets and cry for a while.

i wish there was someone who could hold me while i cried, but...the only someone there is is to far away, and i don't know if i'd let her, even if she weren't.

i'm so fucked up. i can be such a horrible friend.

BD