Well it has been about a month since I've wrote a journal entry or even been on here infact.I travelled to Australia for the month and it wasn't really possible for me to come on here for various reasons.It was a good time though to just take a break from everything I usually do.It was really a month where I could freeze out everyone in my life, and take some time and space for just me and sorting my head out.

It was an excellent experience,and now I am home I am trying not to fall into the same old pattern of life I was in before.Being away gave me a chance to look at the world from a different angle.I just feel better about things.Though I am afraid that after being home for a few days being surrounded by the same old people is going to bring on the same old pattern of behaviour for me.On the other hand I am also quiet determind not to let that happen.

I promised myself before I went away that when I came back that I would get my gay ass out of the closet completly(I know this has been a re-accuring topic for about two years)but this time I am going for it.The thing is for me, and ,maybe everyone else,it is not just a case of saying I'm gay and that just being it.I think it is a gradual thing.Like I need to make some changes in my life and start getting out there too.Simply just saying I'm gay isn't enough.I need to live it too,if that makes sense?Like right now I live as a straight person completly.Almost all my friends are straight, we go to straight bars etc...

Anyway I think thats enough from me on my first journal back.Jet lag is starting to catch me.