The seige had been a success, yet at the same time; a complete failure. There was no one left alive in the castle. Yet I was the only soldier left still walking. It was a disaster, for my liege was dead. The battle turned out for nought.

I looked around me. The smell was indescribably bad. I would have thrown up a number of times if I had anything in me to throw up. Not just because of the smell, mind you; but also because of what I saw.

Bodies were shredded beyond note. My childhood curiosity of what lay under the skin was satisfied to the point of being supersaturated. I now wondered why I ever wondered. I'd seen many an animal slaughtered, and I thought we might be different somehow.

We weren't.

The tales of battle were so glorious. The elder knights would tell their tales, and keep us young ones enrapt. The younger knights looked so noble at the jousting matches on their beautiful steeds, and the titled ladies spoke of them like they were gods.

I wasn't a knight. I could never have hoped for the position. I was just a peasant soldier who managed to suffer a few minor wounds, and kept myself from the worst of the skirmish. My sense of self-preservation over-rode my desire for heroics. Now, I was disgusted with myself. I wasn't even sure I wanted to face anyone anymore. I was still alive because of my own cowardice.

I sat down and I cried. Not a manly thing to do, but I did it anyway. And was a sixteen year old a man? Or just a boy with delusions of manhood? But I thought my tears were justified.

All this caused by a frienship of two great families, betrayed. All this death and destruction of people who's only fault it was, was to work the land of their lords.
At my home, there would be hundreds of orphaned children and widows. A land doomed to be invaded and taken over the minute the news got out of what happened. And I was to face them all alone?

How would I explain myself? How could I? In fact, I wasn't sure I could continue living with all I just went through, or with myself. I drew my dirk and aimed it with an upward thrust to my heart. . .only to have a hand grab my wrist.

He wasn't much bigger than me, and looked close to my age. His power was many times mine, however. When I tried to pull away, I may as well have fought dungeon shackles.

He was in a black silk tunic like I'd never seen before. He also wore fitted boots that I couldn't imagine anything but the finest cobbler in England could have made. If England even had such a cobbler. He was immaculately clean, he smelled of jasmine; which I couldn't really identify, being I had no clue on what jasmine was; and he was the most beautiful lad I ever saw in my life. "No, you don't",
he said to me. He was Irish.

I was still crying. "Don't. . .stop me. Please. Or you finish me off. I should be dead, but I was too lacking in courage to fight as I should have fought. I was worthless. A caitiff. A woman."

He easily pried the knife from my grip, and threw it effortlessly quite an amazing distance. He dragged me to my feet like I was a housecat. He narrowed his eyes, and snarled. "You've obviously never met an Irish woman, and it seems you've never heard of Boadicca."

"Who are you?"

"Donn Ui'Midir, brat. I wonder if I should have left you to someone else, after what you just said. I wonder if I shouldn't just walk away from you right now, and leave you to your own devices; and whatever nightmares your imagination can conjure up."

"If you do I'll be free to kill myself, so go ahead."

The smile he gave me, about made my hair stand on end. "You can't kill what's already dead. Aiken, I have created the illusion that you were the last man alive in this battle. Everyone else on this field is experiencing the exact same thing that you are, but not all will bear your fate."

"You know my name!" That's all that mattered to me. I hardly even heard the rest of the sentence.

"I am of the Tuatha De Danaan. A Gatekeeper of the worlds. One who guides those to the next world after one is through with life. Your mind is mine, along with your life's history. You're a good kid, babe; but insulting the female persuasion did not earn you any bonus points with me, capishe?"

Capishe. I never heard that word, but I knew what it meant. I closed my eyes, and nodded. Knowledge was coming to me that I could not have known. "I have been a woman before, and can become so again."

Donn put his forefingers under my chin and raised my head to look me in the eye. "Not necessarily a bad thing, depending on what culture you are born in. In fact, it can be an advantage."

"So I really am dead?"

"There's no such thing as death. Only transition. You're a pretty easy case. We don't even have to spend hours talking to get you to see that the circumstances of your death were all wrong. Now, let's get to a more scenic environment. . ." the vision of the battlefield suddenly faded to be replaced by that of a beautiful garden, "and let's sit down," he said, as he pointed to a stone bench. My gory, rent rags had been replaced by a clean white shirt, some velvet breeches I could never have afforded, stockings, and a pair of shoes only nobles could afford.

We sat on the bench. "Where are you going to take me?"

"You don't even know that yet, but you should. You haven't contemplated the afterlife enough to expect anything or get immediately placed. You don't know enough to know that yet, but you will. . .in a little while, as you and your other lives of past and future come to-gether. When you decide, you will rest there for a while; until you choose to be reborn again."

"How do you know I'll choose to be reborn again?" I asked.

"I am out of time. We will meet again in the future, and we have met in the past.

"Then if you're out of time, how can you not know where to put me; since you already put me there, even though it's not happened yet?" There was no way I could have asked that question if I had still been alive. I don't think I could have thought of it, and if someone had said something like that to me, I think I would have gotten a bad headache.

"I will know as soon as you know."

"This place is nice."

"This is my garden, on a rare sunny day. It's pretty mundane compared to other locales. I know you're not destined to stay here for the long haul." He closed his eyes. "You need to go where peace is valued."

"Are you seeing something?"

He held up a finger, and paused. After a moment, he said; "There is a peoples, far away. Another continent. Yes, after a stay here you will go to the Fifth World of the Hopi, and then you will be born amongst them in the Fourth, to experience life in the Physical Realm again. It will be different, but it is what you need. I'll share my mind with you shortly, to let you see what I know."

"Hm hm. Can I ask a question?"

"What would have happened to you if you had died with a different view of the battle? If you had died in anger that you hadn't done more damage, and all that?"

"Yes."

This time his grin was mischievous. "I would have petitioned for you to have been reborn a battery hen in the 20th century. Debeaked the day you were born, crammed in a cage with six or seven other chickens where you couldn't even spread your wings, you'd be only sitting or standing on wire for your your whole two year or so life, the lights would never be turned off, you'd be smelling only chicken shit and chicken piss, and laying two or three eggs a day."

I scowled. "Are you serious?"

"That's for me to know, and you to never find out."

Bastard! But I liked 'im.