So heres a quick follow-up to my last post:
all went suprisingly well. J was beyond understanding, but I'm pretty sure that that may just be because she seems to have formed the opinion that I have Dissociative Identity Disorder (multiple personality disorder) and just dont know it. Which, besides the fact that she has DID, is kind of understandable because of her closeness with my sister (who has post-traumatic stress disorder as a result of our shared child-hood experiences... DID is primarily a result of childhood emotional trauma.)

In general, everything is going really really really well with that. I just wish I could see her more often. Which is probably going to happen soon, as my grandad just sent a check in the mail to help out with me getting some transportation.

I got my potters wheel yesterday. i cant remember at the moment if I wrote in here about the completion of my career 360 degree turn. In short, after a years long lovers quarrel (mostly- well, almost completely about money) with art, we have decided to make up and I'm finally committing to a long-term relationship.

I already got my first commission. I'm beyond scared. I might turn it down, because I'm just too damn intimidated, and dont feel like im ready. I was supposed to call around 10 minutes ago to speak with contractors (its a job designing/ executing custom lighting fixtures for this fancy restaurant downtown thats opening in about a month.) but I really think that if i do take it, ill regret it. nothing like a botched job and a bad reputation to start off a career.

Anyways, I'm fucking exhausted-- ive been throwing all morning and my muscles are really not happy with me. I'll try to update more later. right now im definately overdue for some sleep!