My college is a harbor for criminals--an isolated safe haven in the foothills of Oakland.

I'm a little bit in love with the new emergency notification system that my school has implemented this year, I get a phone call, and a text message, and an e-mail whenever something important or dangerous is going down on campus. Right now I can hear a chopper circling overhead and sirens--instead of attributing the law enforcement presence to the typical sounds of Oaklandia, I am thankfully aware that they're all here in honor of a strange man who is running around from the student union off to faculty village and into the bushes just a few short yards from my dorm room.

Seriously, what idiot would try and hide out at a school filled with big butch lesbos? It's fenced in, complete with razor wire, there's only one way out, once you're in you're trapped. But...he's not the first guy to try this. There was the guy with the gun last semester...and the other guy, and then there were a few last year too--and that was before we had this nifty system to tell us to hide in our rooms in case the scary man who probably just robbed the 7/11 up the road tries to kill us.

Days like this, I love Mills.
Though, this probably isn't the sort or thing I'm supposed to tell prospective students about at work.
But I might.