love you hurt me again.........

formula_truth_love's picture

Well i haven't posted in a long time but see I don't kno how to deal with this my first breakup. I was datin a girl whos 22 now we live 2 hours away but with her situation in this country and me being 17 it was hard to see each other. Well she finally fuckin told me that she just wants to be friends and this bullshit scapegoat about how were in two different stages of life and shes passed the one im in. I don't see how that makes it that you can't be with me. Now she let me and her go on for a whole fuckin month without tellin me and during about 3 or 4 weeks of that month she didn't call me at all. Now she tells me that she didn't want to hurt me how can that be she never gave our relationship the shot that i did. She just focused on every moment that wasn't good. When she was breakin up with me she's sayin all this sweet stuff i love you baby and all this stuff that just makes me want to i don't kno how can u tell me everything u like about me and how u love me when u don't want to be with me. Also she says that shes in the real world and im not like my job and me being in college isn't as much of real life as her just having her job. i just am so pissed about the fact that while i was hurtin missin her those weeks she was able to have fun with her friends and all these people took me to call and leave a message for her to return a call and finally tell me that she doesn't care anymore. it fuckin blows i was there for her and gave her everything she asked for and yet all she could see where the things that still strained our relaitonship she expects me to just get over her at the drop of a fuckin pin. i kno her feelings changed i can hear it in her voice the way she talks to me now so dull no emotion no nothing in her voice anymore always sounding kind of annoyed to be talking to me.

Comments

jeff's picture

Hmm...

I have to say I agree with the two different stages thing, so feel free to disregard the rest of the comment now.

Aside from the five years thing, you're already two hours away on top of that. And, somehow your "girlfriend" can not have any interaction with you for a month?! I mean, right there, there's clearly a problem.

Also, you need to have a life outside of a relationship, especially if your girl is two hours away and not picking up the phone or communicating for nearly a month. If you're just sitting around thinking of her, writing to her, waiting for the phone to ring... that's bad news and you deserve better. I wouldn't begrudge the fact that she was out having a life. You can and should have a life outside of your romantic relationship, so I think she got that bit right.

So, I don't think she was being disingenuous. She just knows that you are in two different places and it's unfair for both of you to try and make this work.

Of course, you are free to disagree with her entirely, but you have to accept that as her truth and how she sees things.

I always think people who put a lot of work into their relationships to try and keep them going and together, they're usually in the wrong relationship.

So, stop worrying about her and figure out from this what you need in your next relationship for it to be more successful. Closer to your age, closer to where you live, etc. The more you fixate on her, the more time you're wasting not finding someone else.

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"Be like a postage stamp. Stick to one thing until you get there." -- Josh Billings.

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