That bitch over there is givin' me the side eye. I'ma cut her.

I'll come back with tons of fun ones later, I promise! Some of those nutjob college kids take things really personally though so you'll have to be extra careful with the initial words. Someone once asked me if I'm Native American. We both live in Canada. I don't look Native American. They corrected themselves but the fact that I still always think of it in association with them is pretty bad. It's not even really a big deal and I don't mind it (in some ways it's a compliment!) but political correctness can be necessary for someone to not always look back at that first impression.

I know I have been too sarcastic/humorous sometimes and then when I get goddamn quiet they're all 'omg what's WRONG' or basically demand I say something funny. Be yourself kiddo! But despite all that, remember that you matter more than any of them so heed not what the stupid sayeth. X's and O's.

Ok well I'm back as promised.

I am a naturally amiable/talkative/sarcastic person and until people get sick of that or find something to hate about me - they love me!

When starting up convos with people, you want to AVOID INSULTING OTHERS. Sure, everyone on the planet enjoys bringing others down at some point or another, but the longer you can hold off on it, the better. And 'insulting' doesn't mean outright saying 'that ugly ass hoomophobe over there', it's more towards just demeaning anyone in the room. Recall that these are NEW PEOPLE you are associating with, so for all you know, a person in the room could be their relative or best friend. The person you're talking to could also run their mouth off to that person, and most people genuinely want to hang out with someone who is *positive* rather than negative.

So even if you're only talking for a few minutes or they aren't into it, don't think a last ditch insult at someone they seemingly dislike or a jibe at the school's quality or something will work. Besides, someone prone to insulting things so easily may in fact hold prejudices and as a GLBT person you don't necessarily want to try forging a relationship with those types of people. Yes, exceptions abound but this is my advice to you.

I'm a child of the 90's and movies have always appealed to me, what is something that you can consider yourself well-versed in and neutral ground? And NO, this does NOT include schoolwork. Schoolwork/school subjects/informationary topics or discussion around a professor or your future are *last-ditch bits*. Again, exceptions apply and I admit I've talked for 30+ mins about just a single strand of educationary futures to a potential friend, but you can ALWAYS talk about school, if you want to build a friendship, save that stuff for later! I label these as 'last ditch' as well because if you get a silent moment in the conversation or can't think of a continuing, interesting thing to say, you can just pop in with 'So what do you want to do when you're done university' or 'Oh, what courses have you got going next year?'. Again, you could start off with that BUT a random/sarcastic/poignant comment or phrase will interest someone initially.

I should TOTALLY write a mini-book about this, goddamn. Hopefully this helps everyone who reads it. Don't tell anyone else though, the reality of conversations and society is that some people have to flounder at conversations/whatever otherwise things don't work out. Sad but true. But since you were brainy enough to look here, keep it to yourself!

Ok so back to movies. Movies ARE a generally safe topic for anyone. Even if you wind up bringing up movies that someone hates (I've done this several times, it can get REALLY bad but read on) you can keep asking 'why didn't you like it' or 'what did you think of that actor' or honestly (irony ahead) LIE and say 'Yeah, I HATED that'. Better to become friends and have a change of heart about your so-called least-fav genre later.

Books can be a safe topic, but you want pop culture stuff moreso than anything to initiate successful conversations with strangers.

It heavily depends on your latent social skills, but completely random topics/items or objects in the room can allow relationships to blossom after you begin talking about them. For instance, a few weeks ago when I was introduced to a completely unknown friend of a co-worker, I asked her if she could recite for me the last three meals she'd eaten! I know you're smiling, haha.

Anyway, she tried and couldn't remember the first/technically last one and we laughed about that and I led the convo to those foods she mentioned and we had a great discussion and I added her on Facebook. Even if she had been something like 'Umm, why do you care about what I ate?' I would've just laughed it off (literally) and said 'Well, food can represent so much about a person' or 'I can hardly remember what I last ate, so wanted to see how well someone else could do!' or 'Well, if you can't *do* it...'. These comments could provoke a laugh in return and garner a response, could intrigue some intellectual part or initiate a competitive part of her.

If she had remembered all of what she ate, I could've commended her on a good job and asked some other random thing. I need to run for a bit but hopefully that satiates you for now. I know I rock. Sometimes I wish I wasn't going into what I am for university, I'd have fun as a talk-show host or announcer or something lingo-oriented (salesperson for some big company!).

I'm not saying I'm a party animal or anything, but I do have a lot of fun talking to people on a regular basis. Mostly one-on-one, but that's good too, right?

A good strategy is to ask people questions about themselves or find something you have in common that you can discuss (at college: where are you from? what made you choose x school? how do you like your roommate? freshmen again, huh?). Ask about interests once you get into the conversation, discuss the mutual situation you're in (i hear they have cake for dessert today), or, if you're feeling comfortable, go out on a limb and start a random philosophical conversation with some odd comment about the world. Insults are bad, not only because that person may know the thing you're insulting, but because that person will then think that you gossip behind people's backs all the time, and start thinking you might say the same things about them when their back is turned. Don't bother agreeing with everything someone else says. You're denying your own self then. I mean, don't get into a tizzy over it either, but you don't want to build a friendship on silly falsities.

Small talk (which can lead to real talk) is hard, especially at first. It's a sort of social lubrication. Sometimes you'll try a few conversation starters and all of them will fall flat. "Um. x school was my last choice." or, "I have a single." But ask follow up questions, ask about themselves (people like talking about themselves, and it's a compliment to them that you're interested), and don't lose heart. It'll take time to feel comfortable doing it, but it is worth it.

Remember, everyone else at college is gonna be in the same boat. Don't be shy. Approach someone new. Talking to different people is one of the whole points of college!

Also, Jeff is right. Though I would say it would be rather unhelpful for confidence not to talk to anyone when you start at college. Social confidence is part of confidence confidence too. Part but not all. I've seen a lot of people with one but not the other, but both help in forming positive, lasting relationships.

I'm starting school in a week too. Drop me a pm if you want to chat!

No one has a right to sit down and feel hopeless; there is too much work to do.--Dorothy Day

this is one my friend uses. walk up to someone and
you: how much does a polar bear weigh?
person: i dont know
you: enough to break the ice. hi i'm (insert name here)

little cheesy but its amusing

**Far from a saint, not quite a sinner**

I look for people wearing band t-shirts so I can find common ground musically. Music has the ability to bring people together brilliantly. It especially helps if the band is touring because then you could ask if they're going to the show or not, maybe you'll see them there if you go and such.

But i thought it was in interrogation? maybe thats why they always look at me funny....

**Far from a saint, not quite a sinner**

Why not be a little out there with your conversation starter. I've learned that being straight forward gets you far! I always use, "Hi I'm _______. It usually works for me when meeting new people.

"I am no more than human than anyone else"
"You should stand back and take a good look around"

"If I were you, I'd have sex with me."
"God, did you use Windex on your pants? Because I can see myself in them."
"If I said you had a hot body, would you hold it against me?"
"I wish I were DNA Helicase, so I could unzip your genes."
*Becons with one finger* "If I can make you come with one finger, imagine what I can do with two."

Please note, that if you use any of the above in conversation, the person you're trying to talk to will probably shoot you. xD

Megan: "Cheers are supposed to be simple, make people feel good."
Graham: "Cheers make girls do stupid cartwheels. Orgasms make people feel good."
-But I'm a Cheerleader