So this is gonna be totally scatter-brained cuz I have so many emotions running through me.

First, I'm just gonna quickly go through what happened...
Me and my friend Chelsey went over to Emily's house. We all just talked, laughed, and saw YouTube videos on my iPod (riku and sora cosplay skits in which they're gay). Chelsey kept trying to drop hints to Emily that she likes her, but either she didn't get it or ignored it. Judging by Emily's attitude and contact with Chelsey, I think she only sees her as a good friend. Anyway, we were talking about the new freshman (Chelsey just started band camp) and guessing who'd be gay. Then I mentioned something about my sister having a possible crush on Chelsey which led to her birthday party when Emily and I (almost?) got caught kissing by the kids. I was just kinda quiet about it, but Emily was blushing and giggling over it. Oh, I forgot to mention! While we were all huddled around the iPod watching the videos, I could see Emily looking at me. Like, it wasn't direct eye contact since I saw her out of the corner of my eye, but I seriously saw her glancing at me for a few seconds now and then. Fast forward through all our idle chatter, and it's time to go. Chelsee is lingering by Emily, but then Emily asks her to leave for a second. You can tell Chelsey is kinda disappointed. Well, guess what? Emily gave me a present! She said her parents got mad at her for using all her money on it. I felt so warm and happy! I wanted to kiss her SOOOOOO bad, but I gave her a deep hug. Our hug lingered for a bit, and then we met back up with Chelsey. I was putting my shoes on and I saw Emily whisper to Chelsey. We left, and I later in the car found out that Emily told Chelsey that everytime she kisses her boyfriend she thinks of me! :3

I know this is bad, and many of you have told me to kinda give it up with Emily, but I totally understand her. She's kinda stuck with this whole thing with me. First, I'm gonna be gone in 3 weeks :( The other reason? Her parents are super protective of her. She's 15 (almost 16) and I'm 18. If they caught me doing ANYTHING with her, they wouldn't hesitate to call the cops. Trust me on that.

Well, I'm leaving to Disney soon and with her working and all this stuff I only have 2 possible days to spend with her. How horrible is that? One thing is for sure though: I want one last kiss before I leave. I don't care if her boyfriend hates me because of it. I want that goodbye kiss. All this summer I didn't have a chance to hang out with her because I let jealousy and rejection keep me away from her. I don't care how wrong and chaotic everything was in the past. I can feel that tension when I'm with her. I can feel that she cares, especially now that I've had this time away from her.

I remember seeing an Eeyore bag at her house. It's probably hers. Hmm, maybe I should get her an Eeyore plushie, or something nice like that. She doesn't really like people giving her gifts (she feels there's no need to), but I'm leaving. I think she'll understand.

UPDATE: I just got finished crying. I'm gonna miss all my friends so much.