Can we really have it all; muscle, brain and love?
Gay culture venerate looks, physique. Recent it also looks for role models among itself
A sketchy image of a perfect gay man began to emerge. It is sketchy, neverthless it is an image that many of us including myself began to use as a guidance.
I came a cross Channel4's GaytoZ on the on demand service.
http://www.channel4learning.net/support/programmenotes/micro/gaytoz/inde... Channel4 is a mainstream television station in the UK, with very broad remits, that include provocative program and education materials for teens. As I watched this program I was happy to see another positive portray of Gay youths. It feels as if it is too good to be true. Along with typical days of gay men and women which were spent at home, at school and with friends, while Leaders of LGBTQ community discussed their childhood and adolecense periods.
The program presented a very optimistic view of gay life, which I felt that it may have been economical with the truth. I passed up many opportunities to participate in sports and other activities. I decided to quit playing baseball, because I felt uncomfortable around certain members of the team, and I always had confidence issues. I stopped going an evening theology class, because I had a crush on somebody. My friend called me naff, to let my sexuality to be a limiting factor. I might still be playing baseball if I could tell the coach that I wasn't feeling comfortable with certain remarks made by team member. I might still be studying that class, if I was able to discuss with the chaplain about my feelings even without specifically identifying anyone. If I have somebody to talk I might be havivng it all.
Discussing sexuality is difficult no matter how accepting the other party might have been. Through out our battle to define our identity, we learned to conceal our feelings, and we learned to become self sufficient. It is difficult for gay men and women to open up to their friends and colleagues, especially those who have authorities over us. While my head is telling me to pretend or to conceal who I am, but my heart is wanting to open up. This is the only time my brain rules over everything else. I believe my life would have turned out better, I had right guidance at the right times. In my opinion this is the only difference between queer and questioning youth and other young people.
Previously gay community might be prepare to judge and to categorize everyone based how to dress and what they look like, now opportunity has arise for us to get married, to have children and to succeed without any fear of discriminations, is the community extending its gazing eyes into wallets, dwelling places, diploma frames and family photos?
With my remits as a gay man are forever lengthened, I am yet to fulfill the older remits, which include the six-pack.