Major coming out #2. Tim convinced me to come out to my friend Alex, who I've literally known forever. It scared me because she can be a little homophobic and she is just so oblivious about a lot of things, like, I look really gay and if I never told her, she'd still think I was the straightest straight in straight world. Ha.. lame. Anyway so this is how it happened...
*cue teenage pop punk intro music* (no not really, ew)
Me, Tim and Alex were hanging out at the almost empty skate park, sitting along the edge of the quarter pipe eating chocie bickies and talking. It was Monday, and I had been planning to tell her since Friday sort of.. so I sorta had this plan in my head on how to go about this 'coming out'. I knew I couldn't vocalise it, so my move was to send her a text message instead (yes I know, she was less than a metre away). I casually reach for my phone and find my pre-written message in my outbox folder and give it one more re-read just to make sure it is good enough:
I'm gay. Are we cool about it? If not.. you're a fucken tosser.
(can you tell I didn't want to make it a super serious situation?)
I squeeze Tim's arm and look at him with a worried inquisitive look, he understands my expression and nods. (he didn't know about my message plan though) I take a deep breath and press the send button. Alex's phone goes off almost immediately, she reaches for her phone and looks at me confused and goes "that was you wasn't it?" I looked at her wide eyed and suddenly there's a whole lot of screaming and crying! A little kid had stacked on his little scooter a few meters away and was sobbing his little heart out. Aw.. great timing little fucker. Alex with phone still in hand approaches the little boy to see if he's okay, I slide down the pipe and do the same. Tim refuses to move and remains seated (yeah, ex-skater suck it up attitude). Besides fresh drool patches on his pants, the little boy turns out fine.. but then I begin to freak out, I run up the pipe to where Tim is and cling onto him for dear life. Alex slowly walks over reading the message on her phone with a slightly confused expression on her face. My heart was pounding heaps fast and I was still wrapped around Tim and peeking over him to see Alex's reaction. She sat back down next to us and asked me if I was serious a couple of times. I told her I was and she was like "Oh my god why didn't you just tell me, you didn't have to send me a message" and she was all "I don't care, we've known each other forever". I was relieved, and I got teary (arr I hate getting emotional). She told me not to cry and so I wiped my face on Tim's hoodie, he didn't mind.
It felt surreal.. we went back to normal and didn't talk about it for long. I knew we were both still thinking about it though. We left soon after that and dropped her off at home and nothing else was said about the topic. Still I'm not sure how I feel, I mean it's good because the ball is in her court now. I've done my bit, I just hope it doesn't turn into a "it never happened" situation. I guess I'll see what happens the next time I see her, she might need time to digest the newly found information. But yay for me, it's done now :]