Yesterday I finally worked up the guts to semi-ask my crush out. I think I kind of freaked her out. Not because of what I said or anything, but because my face was completely expressionless the whole time I talked to her.

I was concentrating so hard on what I was saying that I forgot to smile at her as I was talking. I feel so stupid! I mean, how would you like it if someone ran up to you and basically said, “Hey, we should see a movie sometime” with a completely blank face? You’d be kind of creeped out, wouldn’t you? I know I would.

This is basically how our conversation went, in the form of a script:

Scene Number 1 2 A billion Whatever
Setting: The school hallway, in between classes

Utter_insanity: [runs up to Crush] Hey, did you get your student ID from your teachers?
Crush: [nods] Yeah.
Utter_insanity: [nods while completely expressionless] Me too! We should go see a movie or something. You know, if you show your student ID at a movie theatre, they’ll give you a discount on your tickets.
Crush: [is expressionless too for the most part, but also looks a little freaked] Oh, cool. [leaves and heads to her next class]

It took me a little while to realize what I did wrong. When I finally did, I wanted to kick myself. I feel like an idiot.

But during this award ceremony thingymabob later on in the school day, we looked at each other at the same time, and we both shyly smiled at each other at looked away. Maybe she’s forgotten about my horrible excuse for an asking-out by now.

Eh, she probably hasn’t. Darn it.

Should I apologize to her on Monday for acting weird yesterday? I hope I haven’t screwed up any possible chances I might have had with her. I hate worrying like this.

I am so bad with girls. I guess making mistakes is the way you learn, though. The more mistakes I make now, the less I’ll make in the future, I think.