My life is an odd case. My school has a toatle of 350-400 students and is the largest in the area. The neihboring schools in 10 mile radius have also have about 300 students. Out of all the students up here (excluding college students) i would have to say that most are strait. I know of 5 gay boys, 4 bi girls and 2 bi boys. Out of all the people around thats it.

I kept my sexual orientation a secret up until now. I made the mistake of telling a freind. The freind was a very trust worthy freind. He said it didnt matter that i was gay and we would remain freinds. I should of seen it comming... He lied to my face. He took no time in trying to use me, saying shit well if you dont ill tell everyone. I told go for it i dont care anymore. I gave up thinking he wouldnt tell anybody. Was that a mistake. He told my other good freinds first, then he told our group. I caught him trying to tell gossip spreaders. I warned him to knock off his bullshit. I had no were else to go i went to the school counslener and she was right on my side. Elijah my not so trustworthy freind was told to knock it off. She questioned him over and over. He lied to her face and told more people after that.

My parents got a hint of it. So i just told them in an argument. I knew they would take it bad. My dad grabed his work bag and got in his truck and left. My mom started to cry and she packed a suitcase and said to me that i was a discrase and that it was sick and wrong. My parents came back but are completey differnt people now. My dad thinks that there is a cure out there for me. My mom is laying down new rules and trying to destroy my life. We talk little now. My sister says that it doesnt bother her but i know it does. Alot of people know at school now. The secret that i was going to take to my grave is now out. I thought of sucide. But i remembered my past. I am catholic and i still want to go to heaven. So sucide is not the answer. There must be other ways to deal with this. I could deal with at school, but to come home to deal with it, now that is the hard part.

Basicaly i could talk to anyone in the school. Now i have mabey 15-20 freinds toatle left that actualy consider me a human being.

Being gay scared me at first. I was afraid to talk to boys, touch boys, hug anyone, go to dances, do anything. Now i just really dont care anymore. I got this last semester and 2 more years of high school left. Then im done.