Hi there everyone!

I don't come online much since I've moved out and started working all the time. I thought I'd fill you all in on the details of my life. I started playing drums for a punk rock band in Orange County. Work and play filled my days, but I know I should finish school. Then I quit drinking. I started freaking out about going back to school and my best friend, who've I've been in love with for years now, just moved two hours away.

About a weak ago, i found out that one of my band members is a cocain addict and it didn't sit well with me, cause' I was about to start renting a room in her home. I decided not too when I found out about her secret habit and so I went out of state to stay with my folks this week.

I was ready to move back with my family, when my best friend talked me into coming to her home and staying with her so I can go back to school. I reluctantly wanted to come with her, because it's been hell without her. Plus I can finish school with in-state tuition fees.

I long to be in her company again, and I know that we'll get along. That's not the trouble. The trouble is that I don't want to see her with anyone else but me, and I'm not sure how it will be living with her.

We used to spend every waking moment together in Orange County, and it was hard to let her be romantic with others there. Still, I let her live her life her own way and vice verse. I love her as a friend and much more... Believe me she knows. The strange thing, is that at one point she returned my affections, then she turned back to doing things the way she always has. I always thought she wasn't ready for me. So i have vowed to be patient.

I've dated some guys and yet I know in my heart that I love her.

I don't know it's all so confusing really. At least we'll only live together for the semester. THen I want to transfer schools. I don't want to leave her behind, and I don't know if this move will be good for the both of us.

Any advice?