How do I know who he really is?

24 December, 2006 - 8:31pm — musicwith_a_soul

OK for the sake of anyone who reads this I am going to try and shorten this story...

I'm am 17 and I'm a junior in high school. There's a guy that I really like and he's a senior. A couple of years ago, when I first noticed him, I would always stare at him. That ended when one day he decided to give me this cold, mean stare. It crushed me, so I decided one day to just to forget about him. Last year, and I'm trying to make this subtle, I was with my friends and he just happen to sit next to us. Of course being the person who he was, and still is, he was acting all crazy but funny. My friends, girls of course, were fawning over him. In some way I was jealous, but after a while I just became frustrated and upset. It showed too.

Several months later, I noticed that he started to show, I dunno, some of his attention to me. He's never said much, if anything, that I know of to me. I know it sounds bad that I've never talked to him, but we have heard each other talk if that counts(I had planned to do it a certain moment, but it just didn't happen). As far as I know I've never seen him date a girl or anything. When one of my friends said that she liked him, he seemed to be all angry(I'm not sure why). On our last day of school before break I went with a friend up to a class he was in, not knowing it. He seems to not want to be around me or something.

Trying to think if there's anything else....anyways if there is I'll add it later.

I plan on making some changes over my winter break, hopefully for the better. Should I plan on making a first move by talking to him. I have plenty of opportunities as far as I see it.

Thanks for any advice.
musicwith_a_soul

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24 December, 2006 - 9:20pm — patnelsonchilds (not verified)

Hi is a great Place to Start

Sounds like you're a bit obsessed with this dude. I had a similar situation when I was 17 and instead of just trying to be friends with my guy, my fear turned me into a total creepy stalker. I'd advise against that course of action.

What I would do is start with "Hi Tom (Jason, Phil, whatever his name is). He may or not be aware that you are aware of him, but chances are he already is. You'd be surprised how much you can learn just by saying hi, not just once, but each time you encounter him. Does he say hi back? Does he call you by name? Does he smile? Does he make eye contact? If the answer to all or even any of these questions is yes, I would consider attempting some type of conversation. Do you have interests in common? Do you share any classes? Sports? Anime? If so, there's a good place to start. If he ignores your hi's and acts like a jerk, then either he doesn't like you very much, or he does like you but is in complete denial. Either way, there's nothing you can really do about that. In either case, I'd just keep on being nice to him, saying hi and making innocuous conversation. You've got nothing to lose, and it may just pave the way for you to find out more about him and if he's interested in you. If he tells you to get lost, you'll be hurt, but you won't have to wonder anymore. Tell yourself it's his loss and then move on.

- Pat Nelson Childs
"bringing strong gay
characters to Sci-Fi & Fantasy"

www.myspace.com/patnelsonchilds

24 December, 2006 - 9:43pm — musicwith_a_soul

Thanks for the reply. Sorry

Thanks for the reply. Sorry if I made myself sound obsessed. I'm really not a stalker or anything.

25 December, 2006 - 9:11am — Cleopatra

i dunno, but i think you

i dunno, but i think you should know him better before judging his acts and deeds. it's just that, you've said that you two rarely talked, and that means that you really do not know each other that much. i guess you should try befriending him to get to know him better, but as you have said, it seems that he doesnt like you. so i guess what you can do is smile a lot and try to be friendly to him; in time he'll know that you're not one obnoxious being he thinks you are (IF he thinks you're such). so there, try to get to know each other.

"I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me... but it's hard to stay mad, when there's so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to bu

26 December, 2006 - 7:30am — musicwith_a_soul

thanks. it's really good to

thanks. it's really good to hear that. it gives me hope. i guess i just need to get some things sorted out with myself first.