Well, my cousin's wedding was this past weekend, and , as stated in my last journal, my whole family was here, at my house...so I was deprived of oasis and myspace for a while...god I'm a loser...lol. But seriously, we had my lesbian aunt from san francisco, my aunt and incle from san jose, my cousins and aunt from new york, my other lesbian relative from new orleans, and family from all over flying in for the wedding...so the whole week was pretty damn hectic....between my dad calling the house every five minutes, to the super liberal comments and discussions of my relatives, I was in a state of annoyance and chaos for an entire week or so...It was fun tho, because the last time we got the entire family togewther like that was for my grandfather's funeral in pasadena...oh, my other aunt and cousin from LA also came up and my grand-aunt and my aunt and my cousin came down from bellingham...

it was a hell of a week...bteween wedding plans to making huge dinners, to being forced to sleep outside in a tent, to getting bit by bugs, to being burned at seafair, to watching the blue angels and ultimately to the wedding...

well, the family stuff got a little annoying...I can't stand my relatives from san jose, san pedro, and new orleans...they are just too hippie-ish and ex-druggies for me to handle...my mom's family is honestly crazy...they all smoke, oe used to smoke, dope, crack, and use heroin, in the case of the new orleans aunt, and they all act like total hippies, and me being the redneck that I am, I get annoyed by this...especially by george, my cousin...you know the thing on google that says 'did you mean' when u mis-spell a search? yeah, he made that program and was bragging about it the whole week...the testosterone gene in our family obviously skipped him too...the guy has honestly no aggressive side...I look at him and I'm like, damn, this guy hasn't got a pair...he's totally whipped by his woman, he's daughter's a lesbian freak, not because of the lesbianism-she's just really, really weird and out there, and he can't even drive a car...I mean, I couldn't drive a stick in seattle yet, as I'd never been driving on I-5 in my car yet, so I had to let george drive...god, no what a fucking grandma...I mean, he was seriously going 5-10 miles an hour under the speed limit, not using the accelerator at all, and nearly getting hit at 60 miles and hour, granted that he couldn't see out the back due to the bags...on to the wedding...

We arrived at the bride's house where the ceremony was to take place at around five o'clock...when we got there, we parked across the street at the church, waited for the limo, and the limo took us to the house of the bride...where we met my uncle, the father of the groom, my cousin, their friends and a lot of other people...we sat down in the front row, and we got yelled at by the DJ...he announced, the front three rows are for family only...lol, my uncle mike had to go and tell him that we were...Eric, my cousin from LA is black, so he was all like, I can see how you all are connected, but me, c'mon, a black guy in a white family...lol, eric's a comedian, always has been...but the wedding started a little late, the bride had to get ready, and the wedding party began to walk down the aisle...it was a really nice ceremony...it ought to have been, I mean, my cousin and the bride are 26 and they've been together since 8th grade...but then the after ceremony party started and things really got fun...

the dj was really cool, the dinner that my sis had cooked for about 300 ppl that were there was delicious, and the entire wedding party danced for what seemes like days...then It became speech time...my cousin's little bro, my other cousin, starts telling jokes and a story about how my cousin and a friend, u'd have to know them to really appreciate it, tormented him as a little kid by playing pranks on him...then the bride's brother and sis, and friends gave their speeches, followed by my uncle and the party began...

there was a LOT of beer involved though...there was two kegs at the wedding, full of redhook and amber ale...each glass they gave out was about 20 ounces...I had about three or fouf of them and a smaller glass or two after that...but I wasn't drunk...just a little buzzed...like everyone else there, I was just trying to enjoy it...but it got me thinking about all the stuff in life that I want more than anything, but will never even have the opportunity to have...marriage to a beautiful, loving and caring woman, a family, kids, a house...alll that stuff...

So after a really good ceremony, we all hung out at the bride's backyard...my uncle, the groom's dad, came up to me and was like, "we'll be at your wedding soon." I almost said the same thing I almost said to him a year ago-"They'd have to legalize it first" and I just barely stopped myself...had I been a little more drunk, I probably would have involuntarily outed myself in a drunken discussion at my cousin's wedding...damn that was close...

so the day after, we all went to my aunt and uncle's house, had a great meal, again cooked by my sis, and we sat around, talked, took pics, laughed and told stories...then we loaded up and left. The next day I had my psychiatrist appointment in seattle...I went over, talked w/ him for about an hour aboult the wedding, the weekend and the realization that I would never be able to have what i wanted out of life...he talked about all the gay weddings that happen, though they are not officially recognized and about all sorts of issues, including some of which I had w/ a gay co-worker who no longer works w/ me, though he is every negative and annoying stereotype of a gay guy out there...i dunno...but anyway, I had a great and bad week...

but on the bright side, I went up to bellingham the other day to visit my great-aunt and I had one of the best mountain bike rides of my life...there's a mountain near her house that I'd ridden a little of before, but this time, I went all the way to the top, rode down and enjoyed the views...it was heaven...not only was the trail technical and difficult, but the views were amazing...I could see vancouver, the san juan islands, all of bellingham, western washington university, and everywhere for probably thirty of forty miles out...and the trails were amazing...no wonder people come from all over the northwest to ride that mountain...it's just that good...anyway, I have to go now...later.

hellonwheels